Anger

For almost a twelve hour time span (although five of those hours were sleeping) I found myself ANGRY. Angrier than I have been in a very long time.

For those of you who don't know me, I'm a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, a neighbor, a co-worker, an acquaintance, a stranger and likely many more, in no particular order.

I was angry to learn that someone that I have come close to chose with blatant disregard for others to behave in irrational and self-gratifying ways. Not only did he do so without any concern for anyone else's safety, he bragged about his behaviors afterward. I understand that many people are very self-serving and at whatever cost, but to learn that it was someone that I have formed a close relationship is unacceptable.

He boasted that he was "stoned" skiing. He put on boots and strapped skis to his feet and at speeds upwards to 63mph he skied "stoned" with your mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, daughters, sons, friends, neighbors, acquaintances and strangers. While he condones those that drive drunk and intoxication, he, a man who believes in the legalization of marijuana and recreational/social use as one would consume a beer, got "stoned" and put everyone at risk. And had the audacity to brag about it to someone.

I'M ANGRY.

Angry at his general disregard for others. Why is it that the helpless, undeserving, unaware often fall victims of others stupidity? Sure, I have strong feelings of substance abuse. Feel free to use at your discretion in the comforts of your own residence. Don't abuse and then like a ticking time bomb have the audacity to harm others with your selfishness.

I can only control what I can control, myself. But learning a small portion of his reality that he hid and his scorned behavior toward alcoholism, he is no different. While that occasion he didn't get behind the wheel (to my knowledge), by strapping on skis he had the potential to kill just as easily without others having the barrier and protection of a vehicle.

I am hurt. I am angry. This is my apology to you, for the behavior of someone that I came to know and care for that potentially could have caused you pain and heartache too.