People...Burnout

SIGH...

I seem to be doing that a lot lately. Not the overly dramatic type of sigh, but the resolute, burned out, weathered, lack of words, lack luster, defeated form of sigh.

I'm tired. I'm tired of using empathy to understand people. To understand their motivation or lack thereof. I'm tired of people saying (or preaching) one thing and doing another. Every time I look or turn around, I'm confronted with yet another person. Yet another disappointment. Or is it more, confirmation? Confirmation that people are only human. They aren't perfect?

I tend to believe that is BS. When did it become acceptable to not be accountable for your actions? When did YOU become more important than others or their time?

Why do I feel more often than not, I'm struggling. Struggling to understand why it seems so difficult for others to live by morals, ethics and rights? When do people stop caring about others and being the best "ME" possibly and become self-absorbed?

It isn't just in my personal life (where I think I'm more defeated and willing to accept) but also in my professional life. When did it become acceptable for people to schedule appointments that were necessary and important - that they requested more often than not - to "forget" them? I'm becoming better about confirming appointments and 90% of them they "forgot" and I need to reschedule. In the day and age of technology - crackberries, cell phones, ipads, computers...let alone the old pocket calendar (which I still swear by!) how does one not remember an appointment? Sigh...

Then, don't even get me started on the people that feel that their religious beliefs give them vindication, validation and reason to be inhumane. Over the years, I've found myself (born and raised Catholic) more and more irritated with "holy rollers" or those that feel that they are above all others because they are "Godly" or "God-spoken" and they live in his ways. Why is it that those that self-proclaim and preach are often the most hypocritical? These God speaking persons (some even Pastors and their spouses) justify their behaviors - because afterall, God must forgive all sins right? Therefore, those that frequent a religious sector or frequent a place of worship have the most accessibility to forgiveness of sins, right?

Because the way I was born and raised, it isn't OK to make a toddler who has food issues (different than your own) sit at the table for hours because she won't eat her meal. Or better yet, when that wasn't acceptable for the family, make the child spit their unswallowed food into a cup and eat it at the next meal or the next morning. Afterall they tell me, that's "creative discipline" and they say "it works".

Yes, I'm sure in the bible somewhere, this is acceptable to not waste or want. I'm sure someone can reference a biblical verse for me. Truth is, when did understanding a child's needs not become necessary - even when the child isn't your own, or even theirs? And forcing a child to eat what's been chewed and not swallowed, is that not some form of abuse? But it worked, they exclaimed! How young is too young to create an eating disorder in a child?

I'm at a loss. I just don't know what to say anymore...