As everyone is more than well aware, the stock market sucks (which is a complete understatement). I've completely run out of Kleenex at my office as I go through a box everytime I get the nerve to check how much my 401k has lost. Good thing I'm still young, or I might really have a reason to be concerned. For now, I love the idea of throwing my money out the window (although I wish I could enjoy seeing it blowing freely from the wind and my exhaust as I drive away without a care in the world!).
Today I received an email with the best financial advice for 2009 yet, so without further ado I share with you (even sharing in the RED):
For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks!
Watch for these consolidations in 2008:
1) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W R. Grace Co. Will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.
2) Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly, Warner Cracker.
3) 3M will merge with Goodyear and become: MMMGood.
4) Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa
5) FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP.
6) Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become: Fairwell Honeychild.
7) Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: PouponPants.
8) Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become: Knott NOW!
And finally...
9) Victoria 's Secret and Smith &Wesson will merge under the new name: TittyTittyBangBang
HAPPY INVESTING!
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