In a few days, I will leave the comforts and security of my home and town and go on vacation. I will be heading out to Summit County Colorado to ski.
I tuned my skis and I packed up my ski equipment. I will be flying out to Denver and will be picked up by a new friend to ski for the week. I met him online a few months ago for the sole purpose of him joining some friends and I in Colorado to share a condo in January. He seemed normal enough and I told him if he and anyone else wanted to join us, they could for the set amount of the week of the condo. He said that he was in and so was a friend of his.
A few weeks ago, he told me he was going out to Colorado for Christmas and he invited me to join him. I initially laughed at the idea, as did he. And within 24 hours, I utilized my free round trip airfare and am joining him on his adventure. At that point, I had only met him once. Since then, he and his female friend/roommate B have hung out with my friends and I several times. Other than the first time I met him, when I was later accompanied by a friend who joined us, I have never been alone with him. My friends all like him. I like him. He likes me.
He likes me for ME. He isn't in love with me. He doesn't want to date me. He doesn't covet me because I may have things that his ex doesn't have. He clearly enjoys my company and we have something in common, skiing.
He and B came over on Sunday night and picked up my skis and equipment. We talked for several hours before they left. B enlightened me that he is quite the extreme skier as he skis with a camel back, backpack and bungee cords. None of which I care to use. I prefer to live. I prefer to enjoy the groomed trails. I have no desire to meet my destiny with a tree. I have a son and I have a life which I love and would like to continue to live. I'm not about to bungee my skis to my back and hike up cliffs to extreme ski. I'm not going to find myself in areas where I will need to utilize water and snacks and other resources since I'm off the beaten path. I've told him that I can meet him at the bottom of the bunny hills! And, I'm really not joking. It's true that I've been skiing for 27 years. When I was a teenager I was much more extreme and adventurous, that was two knee surgeries and one child ago.
I have responsibilities. I have limits. In many ways I refuse to allow my limitations from holding me back from experiencing fun and living life; however, by no means will I throw caution to the wind and do something irresponsible and at risk. I am a mother first and foremost, whether he is with me or not. He can take any risk that he wants but I do not have to be part of all of them.
I do hope that we have a fabulous adventure. Of course I am nervous. Nervous to spend a week alone with someone that I barely know. Even spending a weekend with someone that I think I know has turned out badly. I can only hope that we not only tolerate each other but enjoy each other's company knowing that a friendship is growing and we hope to have many more adventures with each other. Maybe it's different with the expectations and drama that people have when there is nothing on the line. When there is nothing but two people with the same common goal - to go on vacation, to ski, to have fun and to enjoy someone else's company without the drama, trials and pitfall's of everyday life.
And with that, I'm figuratively jumping off the cliff and hoping to land into soft powder that will cushion my fall, freeze my hair and give me a permanent smile and memories of a lifetime!
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Love quote
I heard a quote in a movie the other day that had me thinking..."Thank you for loving me."
I found it extremely touching. Moving. Thought provoking. Maybe I was in one of those moods.
I began to reminisce about times one might share with another their love. Times that may seem premature but the moment was right. That at that very moment, all you truly felt was love. But does that mean that you actually love the person? Do we often put too much weight into when someone says "I love you" or when we hear it?
Have you ever said it to someone because you felt feelings of love, but may not have been "in love" with them? That your feelings and emotions were growing and you shared something later only to question whether it was legitimate. Or maybe because of the other persons response you questioned whether you should have shared. Do some people put too much credence into the fact that you may love them that it means something more permanent or forever?
I know when I looked into his eyes and I thought about the answer to his question, that what I felt, that what I knew at that very moment, was that I loved him. Without holding back, without protecting myself or wondering what the repercussions of what I may have said, I didn't hold back and I told him I loved him. And from that moment on, nothing ever was the same. There was no turning back. There was no changing how I felt at that moment and what I said. And I wouldn't change it, since it was precisely what I felt. However, nothing would ever be the same again. How is it that a single word or a single action in the moment can change everything?
It changed things for him, for me, for us. Maybe it's fear that dominates, that holds one back from truly living, experiencing, hearing, being...maybe it's ultimately something else that only you know the answer. I suppose there will always be answers that I will never know.
I found it extremely touching. Moving. Thought provoking. Maybe I was in one of those moods.
I began to reminisce about times one might share with another their love. Times that may seem premature but the moment was right. That at that very moment, all you truly felt was love. But does that mean that you actually love the person? Do we often put too much weight into when someone says "I love you" or when we hear it?
Have you ever said it to someone because you felt feelings of love, but may not have been "in love" with them? That your feelings and emotions were growing and you shared something later only to question whether it was legitimate. Or maybe because of the other persons response you questioned whether you should have shared. Do some people put too much credence into the fact that you may love them that it means something more permanent or forever?
I know when I looked into his eyes and I thought about the answer to his question, that what I felt, that what I knew at that very moment, was that I loved him. Without holding back, without protecting myself or wondering what the repercussions of what I may have said, I didn't hold back and I told him I loved him. And from that moment on, nothing ever was the same. There was no turning back. There was no changing how I felt at that moment and what I said. And I wouldn't change it, since it was precisely what I felt. However, nothing would ever be the same again. How is it that a single word or a single action in the moment can change everything?
It changed things for him, for me, for us. Maybe it's fear that dominates, that holds one back from truly living, experiencing, hearing, being...maybe it's ultimately something else that only you know the answer. I suppose there will always be answers that I will never know.
Gambling, Fun or Child Abuse
T loves football. T dreams football. T lives for football. T doesn't play football.
T doesn't like the bruises he accrued when he played full tackle football. T loves the sport of football. If he could, he would eat, sleep and breathe football. He prefers professional football over college, but he watches college as well. He also loves all football video games. The first thing in the morning and the last thing at night is ESPN. He knows players. He knows stats. He studies injury lists. He knows football.
So it's only right that I promote and support my 12.75 year old son to gamble in a football pool. He has participated for the past several years. Maybe I promote and encourage his excitement in the game by having him participate; however, years past when he's been knocked out, his interest throughout the season continues to the same level.
This year, T is still in the pool. I never make him pay the entrance fee to play. He does however know how much he could potentially win if he wins the pool. This year, in the Survivor football pool, there were 52 people. After week #16, T and two others remain. T has studied the odds for this week, he's studied the remaining two people's choices and who he believes that they will pick (as a team cannot be picked twice by a single person in the season). He takes this very seriously. I wonder if it is too seriously.
T told me his dad asked him what he was going to buy him or give him with his winnings. What? He said he told him, "nothing". I said he should give him a "high five". T thought that was funny. His dad is apparently saying that he needs to remember who is buying him Christmas presents! I said, "Yes. Your mom is buying you Christmas presents and it is because of your mom that you are in the pool."
So again, I wonder, am I promoting gambling of my pre-adolescent teen? Is that a form of child abuse? Would it be child abuse if he won and I didn't give him his winnings? Think of what I could do with that money!!! Ok, I'm seriously kidding. He did the research, he took his passion and his love of the sport and is doing well in a strategy and luck pool. If he wins, I can only hope that he will remember who paid his entrance fee! Afterall, he's done very well this season but he's still a world away from winning. Kind of like my Thanksgiving Day square where all I needed was the Lions to score a field goal in the last three minutes of the first quarter and I would win $240. So close and yet...impossible!
T doesn't like the bruises he accrued when he played full tackle football. T loves the sport of football. If he could, he would eat, sleep and breathe football. He prefers professional football over college, but he watches college as well. He also loves all football video games. The first thing in the morning and the last thing at night is ESPN. He knows players. He knows stats. He studies injury lists. He knows football.
So it's only right that I promote and support my 12.75 year old son to gamble in a football pool. He has participated for the past several years. Maybe I promote and encourage his excitement in the game by having him participate; however, years past when he's been knocked out, his interest throughout the season continues to the same level.
This year, T is still in the pool. I never make him pay the entrance fee to play. He does however know how much he could potentially win if he wins the pool. This year, in the Survivor football pool, there were 52 people. After week #16, T and two others remain. T has studied the odds for this week, he's studied the remaining two people's choices and who he believes that they will pick (as a team cannot be picked twice by a single person in the season). He takes this very seriously. I wonder if it is too seriously.
T told me his dad asked him what he was going to buy him or give him with his winnings. What? He said he told him, "nothing". I said he should give him a "high five". T thought that was funny. His dad is apparently saying that he needs to remember who is buying him Christmas presents! I said, "Yes. Your mom is buying you Christmas presents and it is because of your mom that you are in the pool."
So again, I wonder, am I promoting gambling of my pre-adolescent teen? Is that a form of child abuse? Would it be child abuse if he won and I didn't give him his winnings? Think of what I could do with that money!!! Ok, I'm seriously kidding. He did the research, he took his passion and his love of the sport and is doing well in a strategy and luck pool. If he wins, I can only hope that he will remember who paid his entrance fee! Afterall, he's done very well this season but he's still a world away from winning. Kind of like my Thanksgiving Day square where all I needed was the Lions to score a field goal in the last three minutes of the first quarter and I would win $240. So close and yet...impossible!
T's Dinner
T's favorite meal...is anything that can be made in 15 minutes or less. He does have some favorites, but for the most part, when he's hungry, he wants to eat NOW.
For Thanksgiving, I didn't host or cook. I haven't really been cooking much of anything lately. I seem to be in a funk, again just with the idea of cooking anything more than convenience for T and I seems like a waste. A few weeks ago I made a fabulous turkey vegetable lasagna that could have fed a small army. We had lasagna for dinner, lunch, dinner and even gave some away. Other than that I haven't really bothered to make anything that was even remotely labor intensive. And I still haven't.
T loves ham. Other than on a deli sandwich or with pineapple on a pizza, I prefer to avoid ham. I do much better with ham in things rather than by itself with sides.
My parents are coming for Christmas. I will make Christmas dinner, which personally, I do enjoy cooking. I like making several things in addition to the mess. Multi-tasking for a reason is really something I enjoy. Dinner will be rather easy and seeing that I'll be heading out of town for a week, leftovers aren't much of an option but a waste. My parents are bringing steak, which T refuses to eat. T wants ham.
To pacify T, I told him that I wouldn't cook ham for Christmas Eve dinner, but we could have it tonight so that he could have leftovers. In the spirit, I picked up a 6.75 pound ham, way more than we can fathom, but it was definitely more cost effective. I picked up T and brought him home today during a late lunch and threw the ham into the oven. T's responsibility due to his strong fear of the stove and oven, was to turn it on!
The ham actually smelled good when I walked in the door. Much better than the lingering ham smell on my hands from putting it into the roasting pan and oven before I headed back to work. T made his favorite cheesy mashed potatoes (another ugh for me!) while I cut up veggies for a salad. Within fifteen minutes of walking in the door, we had carved ham, instant cheesy mashed potatoes and a greek salad. Less than an hour later from walking in the door, we ate, dishes are done and we have the night ahead of us.
T is completely happy. He had his favorites in a short amount of time and I have enough ham left over for him to have for Christmas Eve dinner and enough to make ham and cheese breakfast casserole for Christmas morning. Win Win. And the best part, the ham actually was pretty good!
For Thanksgiving, I didn't host or cook. I haven't really been cooking much of anything lately. I seem to be in a funk, again just with the idea of cooking anything more than convenience for T and I seems like a waste. A few weeks ago I made a fabulous turkey vegetable lasagna that could have fed a small army. We had lasagna for dinner, lunch, dinner and even gave some away. Other than that I haven't really bothered to make anything that was even remotely labor intensive. And I still haven't.
T loves ham. Other than on a deli sandwich or with pineapple on a pizza, I prefer to avoid ham. I do much better with ham in things rather than by itself with sides.
My parents are coming for Christmas. I will make Christmas dinner, which personally, I do enjoy cooking. I like making several things in addition to the mess. Multi-tasking for a reason is really something I enjoy. Dinner will be rather easy and seeing that I'll be heading out of town for a week, leftovers aren't much of an option but a waste. My parents are bringing steak, which T refuses to eat. T wants ham.
To pacify T, I told him that I wouldn't cook ham for Christmas Eve dinner, but we could have it tonight so that he could have leftovers. In the spirit, I picked up a 6.75 pound ham, way more than we can fathom, but it was definitely more cost effective. I picked up T and brought him home today during a late lunch and threw the ham into the oven. T's responsibility due to his strong fear of the stove and oven, was to turn it on!
The ham actually smelled good when I walked in the door. Much better than the lingering ham smell on my hands from putting it into the roasting pan and oven before I headed back to work. T made his favorite cheesy mashed potatoes (another ugh for me!) while I cut up veggies for a salad. Within fifteen minutes of walking in the door, we had carved ham, instant cheesy mashed potatoes and a greek salad. Less than an hour later from walking in the door, we ate, dishes are done and we have the night ahead of us.
T is completely happy. He had his favorites in a short amount of time and I have enough ham left over for him to have for Christmas Eve dinner and enough to make ham and cheese breakfast casserole for Christmas morning. Win Win. And the best part, the ham actually was pretty good!
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Gift Suspense...
How are you about giving and receiving gifts? Is the suspense too much to handle? Do you appreciate not knowing any secrets, any surprises, any details until it's time?
I've been known to not do well with surprises. I tend to want to know enough information to get me through - say a getaway weekend - or nothing at all - which then leads me to not being receptive or excited enough for the giver. I suppose gift receiving is harder than gift giving. What if your response isn't what the giver expected? I prefer to be the giver - although there are also the disappointments of not meeting the expectations of the receiver.
So I am truly torturing my son. I told him the other day that we would have to be home on Saturday for his first Christmas present between 12-5. It has been a barrage of questions since then - some which I've done my best to throw him off without actually lying about the answer. Because clearly, how many questions can one ask without narrowing down the answer?
Is it an event? No
Is it a person? No
Is it specific to Saturday only? No
Is it big? Yes?
Is it small? No
Is it long? No
Is it heavy? Yes
Is it light? No
Is it skiing related? No
Is it technology related? Ummm...maybe. No. Ummm...
Can you talk to it? Yes
Can it talk to you? Yes?
Do you jump on this? You can (in a figurative sense - but he doesn't know that!)
Is it meant for jumping on? NO
Can you throw it? You can (but please don't - I won't be happy!)
Is it meant for throwing? NO
Is it sports related? It can be.
Did you get this at the store? No
Did you make this? No
Would this go in my room? No
Would this go in the garage? No
Is it clothes related? No
Can I use it in the winter? Yes
Can I use it in the summer? Maybe
Can I use it in the spring? Yes
So I can use it year round? Yes
Would I have fun with this present? Yes?
Is this present a one and only time thing? No
Does this present move on it's own? No
Is it art and craft related? No
The questions have continued. The funny thing, in between him taking a break from asking questions, a commercial for Dish HD receiver, HD 140 channels and three months of free Showtime and HBO came on the t.v. Not once did he make a single comment about how cool that would be to actually have for our 1080p t.v. that is not HD.
He has officially proclaimed that he is...STUMPED. Regardless that I told him there was a HUGE hint provided sometime during his questioning. Which then threw him into a tizzy and a spew of more repetitive questions and a barrage of new ones.
Personally, I am loving this! I find this most entertaining!
Maybe he will truly be surprised when the service tech. comes to the door to spend the afternoon installing our HD and DVR. But for now, I'm enjoying his struggling to guess.
I've been known to not do well with surprises. I tend to want to know enough information to get me through - say a getaway weekend - or nothing at all - which then leads me to not being receptive or excited enough for the giver. I suppose gift receiving is harder than gift giving. What if your response isn't what the giver expected? I prefer to be the giver - although there are also the disappointments of not meeting the expectations of the receiver.
So I am truly torturing my son. I told him the other day that we would have to be home on Saturday for his first Christmas present between 12-5. It has been a barrage of questions since then - some which I've done my best to throw him off without actually lying about the answer. Because clearly, how many questions can one ask without narrowing down the answer?
Is it an event? No
Is it a person? No
Is it specific to Saturday only? No
Is it big? Yes?
Is it small? No
Is it long? No
Is it heavy? Yes
Is it light? No
Is it skiing related? No
Is it technology related? Ummm...maybe. No. Ummm...
Can you talk to it? Yes
Can it talk to you? Yes?
Do you jump on this? You can (in a figurative sense - but he doesn't know that!)
Is it meant for jumping on? NO
Can you throw it? You can (but please don't - I won't be happy!)
Is it meant for throwing? NO
Is it sports related? It can be.
Did you get this at the store? No
Did you make this? No
Would this go in my room? No
Would this go in the garage? No
Is it clothes related? No
Can I use it in the winter? Yes
Can I use it in the summer? Maybe
Can I use it in the spring? Yes
So I can use it year round? Yes
Would I have fun with this present? Yes?
Is this present a one and only time thing? No
Does this present move on it's own? No
Is it art and craft related? No
The questions have continued. The funny thing, in between him taking a break from asking questions, a commercial for Dish HD receiver, HD 140 channels and three months of free Showtime and HBO came on the t.v. Not once did he make a single comment about how cool that would be to actually have for our 1080p t.v. that is not HD.
He has officially proclaimed that he is...STUMPED. Regardless that I told him there was a HUGE hint provided sometime during his questioning. Which then threw him into a tizzy and a spew of more repetitive questions and a barrage of new ones.
Personally, I am loving this! I find this most entertaining!
Maybe he will truly be surprised when the service tech. comes to the door to spend the afternoon installing our HD and DVR. But for now, I'm enjoying his struggling to guess.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Date Night Results
Tonight I picked up our artistry from our date night last week. Seeing that I'm clearly a 3rd grade art failure and a complete A personality, painting and artistry isn't really my thing. I do enjoy it, and some may even call it Zen. I clearly wouldn't go that far!
I did enjoy the time that T and I had together. Picking up our crafts tonight, I actually thought that they both turned out rather well. Not ready to give up my day job, whatever that is, but I think T will like it!
Hopefully Grandma won't find time to check out the blog before Christmas! T was a little disappointed in how his turned out, noting every spot of missed colored paint, a true perfectionist, no doubt! I of course think it's great!
Bug
This morning I woke up and I feel pretty awful, well from my neck up on the left side, only. I'm really hoping the sore throat and the earache subside quickly. I had a feeling I might be coming down with something and the last thing I have time for, is to be sick.
I imagine that my latest sleeping patterns averaging about 3.5 hours of sleep for the past five nights haven't helped. Granted only two of those nights were because I was out trying to live my Rockstar life. Two others, I was thoroughly engrossed in a book, Still Life. The book needed to be returned in seven days, so being completely enthralled, I decided completing it in less than two was high priority! So last night I spent a solid twelve hours, in bed. Sweating and sleeping it out. Granted, I feel worse today, but I'm hoping that's because I'm working it out of my system! I can only hope, since beyond this weekend, I'll be terribly busy with work, Christmas and VACATION!
Fortunately for me, I purchased another one of T's Christmas gifts last night. At least that's what I'm calling it! Not that I have any idea what I'm doing and again I was in the mood to agree with just about anything, anyone was willing to sell me. Just tell me what I need, how much and DO IT! Clearly, I'll deal with any repercussions, later. So Saturday I will be homebound at the service of a technician for four hours. What better way then to enforce that I will lay low?
I imagine that my latest sleeping patterns averaging about 3.5 hours of sleep for the past five nights haven't helped. Granted only two of those nights were because I was out trying to live my Rockstar life. Two others, I was thoroughly engrossed in a book, Still Life. The book needed to be returned in seven days, so being completely enthralled, I decided completing it in less than two was high priority! So last night I spent a solid twelve hours, in bed. Sweating and sleeping it out. Granted, I feel worse today, but I'm hoping that's because I'm working it out of my system! I can only hope, since beyond this weekend, I'll be terribly busy with work, Christmas and VACATION!
Fortunately for me, I purchased another one of T's Christmas gifts last night. At least that's what I'm calling it! Not that I have any idea what I'm doing and again I was in the mood to agree with just about anything, anyone was willing to sell me. Just tell me what I need, how much and DO IT! Clearly, I'll deal with any repercussions, later. So Saturday I will be homebound at the service of a technician for four hours. What better way then to enforce that I will lay low?
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Women...By Annonymous
One Flaw In Women
Women have strengths that amaze men.....
They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideas.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN, IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.
Women have strengths that amaze men.....
They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideas.
They give moral support to their family and friends.
Women have vital things to say and everything to give.
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN, IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.
Hidden Cost of Convenience
Last month, I realized that one of my two reoccurring utility bills could be paid online. I love the idea of paying bills online for not only the convenience, saving a stamp, but not having to write a check. I have been savoring my checks and don't feel like ordering more, since I use them so infrequently. I set up the online account and paid the first bill online. Done deal.
This month, I went online to pay the bill and what did I notice? A new convenience handling charge to pay online of $5.00. Is this something new that they have decided to throw in or did I inadvertently miss it in my previous excitement of convenience. While the cost isn't severe if your bill is up to $500, only 1%, it can be upwards to a 10% charge for a bill of $50.
I think I'll stick to dropping a check in the mail every month. Some things really aren't worth the minute of inconvenience.
This month, I went online to pay the bill and what did I notice? A new convenience handling charge to pay online of $5.00. Is this something new that they have decided to throw in or did I inadvertently miss it in my previous excitement of convenience. While the cost isn't severe if your bill is up to $500, only 1%, it can be upwards to a 10% charge for a bill of $50.
I think I'll stick to dropping a check in the mail every month. Some things really aren't worth the minute of inconvenience.
Communication
I am often amazed how much communication affects...everything. The way one communicates. How much one is willing or not willing to share. Friendships are made and lost over the way one chooses to communicate.
I tend to be upfront, brash, honest and communicative. If I feel something or think something, I often share it, sooner than later. I don't have the time or energy to harbor feelings. To eventually sweep them under the rug and hope they never return. I want to get it off my chest, throw it out there, hash it out if necessary and move on. Maybe I think too much, so communicating comes easier to me than most. Even with this blog, I often read about bloggers writing drafts (often many of them) and deciding whether or not to post, even others unsure of emails they may write. I suppose for difficult topics, maybe this is necessary. But for me, this is my dumping ground, my space, my thoughts. Seldom do I use this blog to dump things that I haven't already discussed, so it's not that much of a waste management effort; however, there are things that I just don't and won't blog about.
Besides, since my hair color is dark, it tends to show the grey quickly. I choose not to expedite the discoloration any moreso than necessary by adding additional stress.
I think, the older I get, as I'm quickly approaching the hill...I seem to find less and less time and energy to expend on people that aren't willing to either effectively or openly communicate.
I tend to be upfront, brash, honest and communicative. If I feel something or think something, I often share it, sooner than later. I don't have the time or energy to harbor feelings. To eventually sweep them under the rug and hope they never return. I want to get it off my chest, throw it out there, hash it out if necessary and move on. Maybe I think too much, so communicating comes easier to me than most. Even with this blog, I often read about bloggers writing drafts (often many of them) and deciding whether or not to post, even others unsure of emails they may write. I suppose for difficult topics, maybe this is necessary. But for me, this is my dumping ground, my space, my thoughts. Seldom do I use this blog to dump things that I haven't already discussed, so it's not that much of a waste management effort; however, there are things that I just don't and won't blog about.
Besides, since my hair color is dark, it tends to show the grey quickly. I choose not to expedite the discoloration any moreso than necessary by adding additional stress.
I think, the older I get, as I'm quickly approaching the hill...I seem to find less and less time and energy to expend on people that aren't willing to either effectively or openly communicate.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
When you least expect it...
Sometimes things are planned. Sometimes you search and you research. You do your homework and you know what to expect. You think you know. You think you know how your senses will react, what you will smell, see, hear, feel. But how will you react? How will you react to those senses? Is it how you anticipated? Is it what you expected? Will you be disappointed?
Sometimes life is worth taking a chance. Taking a risk. Allowing doors to open. Taking opportunities that may not seem safe, predictable, right. Sometimes it's about listening to your gut and your instinct while other times it's about allowing change and the unknown.
Often times, it seems like disappointment surfaces when expectations are not met. When you have dreams and aspirations, faith and trust only to be disappointed. Often times, it's when you expect the least, that one is often truly blessed. It is in the small things in life, the things that one may take for granted that truly can reap the most reward.
It's about having faith to see beyond your nose, to see through the scope and allow. Because often, when you least expect it, you will be pleasantly surprised. Surprised by a thought, an action, a reaction. Either by something, someone or even yourself when you least expect.
And when that happens, it's a truly wonderful and amazing thing. To know that something positive, something wonderful, something glorious is possible. That at times when life or others seem to cause strife or disappointment there is always a glimmer of hope, a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, a sparkle in the eye of a stranger, the unexpected when you least expected. And all is good. All is right.
Sometimes life is worth taking a chance. Taking a risk. Allowing doors to open. Taking opportunities that may not seem safe, predictable, right. Sometimes it's about listening to your gut and your instinct while other times it's about allowing change and the unknown.
Often times, it seems like disappointment surfaces when expectations are not met. When you have dreams and aspirations, faith and trust only to be disappointed. Often times, it's when you expect the least, that one is often truly blessed. It is in the small things in life, the things that one may take for granted that truly can reap the most reward.
It's about having faith to see beyond your nose, to see through the scope and allow. Because often, when you least expect it, you will be pleasantly surprised. Surprised by a thought, an action, a reaction. Either by something, someone or even yourself when you least expect.
And when that happens, it's a truly wonderful and amazing thing. To know that something positive, something wonderful, something glorious is possible. That at times when life or others seem to cause strife or disappointment there is always a glimmer of hope, a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, a sparkle in the eye of a stranger, the unexpected when you least expected. And all is good. All is right.
Almost Four Months...
I don't know the exact number of days. I clearly don't know the exact number of hours. I know it was roughly four months. I know it was not nearly long enough. But sometimes it's about savoring the opportunity and the time and the memories. Fortunately for me, I know that there will be more, just different as circumstances change, and life happens and as long as life happens and not death, there is always time. Time for more. Time for new.
I sit here thinking about JA. About the first time we met on that fall day. How she approached me and asked if she could join me in my walk. I always get confused as to how long we've known each other. How many falls ago was that? For it always seems longer, as if she is possibly a kindred spirit, or maybe just because we became such good friends through our frequent contact and growing friendship.
I had the opportunity of working with JA, in the same office that is, for almost four months. For almost four months, I saw her almost daily, when time had often found us short and visits were becoming few and far between. I looked forward to seeing her. To see her smile. To hear her tales. To share in her frustration. None of that has changed, except the frequency and availability of physically seeing her.
I miss her. I think of her often. I do hope she knows how much I care about her. About her family. I sit here looking at the family Christmas card, a picture that I took and as always, I think of only good thoughts as I have none other for JA.
We can't predict how, when or why people enter our lives. We can only appreciate the opportunity. I am truly blessed to have her friendship and I hope it continues for a lifetime!
I sit here thinking about JA. About the first time we met on that fall day. How she approached me and asked if she could join me in my walk. I always get confused as to how long we've known each other. How many falls ago was that? For it always seems longer, as if she is possibly a kindred spirit, or maybe just because we became such good friends through our frequent contact and growing friendship.
I had the opportunity of working with JA, in the same office that is, for almost four months. For almost four months, I saw her almost daily, when time had often found us short and visits were becoming few and far between. I looked forward to seeing her. To see her smile. To hear her tales. To share in her frustration. None of that has changed, except the frequency and availability of physically seeing her.
I miss her. I think of her often. I do hope she knows how much I care about her. About her family. I sit here looking at the family Christmas card, a picture that I took and as always, I think of only good thoughts as I have none other for JA.
We can't predict how, when or why people enter our lives. We can only appreciate the opportunity. I am truly blessed to have her friendship and I hope it continues for a lifetime!
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Elephant Joke
This morning I was told a joke that I missed last night, so enjoy:
How do you fit an elephant on the subway?
Any guesses?
Take the "S" out of subway and the "F" out of way.
And your answer is?
There is no F in way!!! (...There is no eff'n way!)
How do you fit an elephant on the subway?
Any guesses?
Take the "S" out of subway and the "F" out of way.
And your answer is?
There is no F in way!!! (...There is no eff'n way!)
Night on the Town
Last night we went out and hit the town. There were eight of us that met up for dinner and then the six singles went on to a night of bowling, while the one lonely couple went home, it was afterall their bedtime at 10:00p.m.!
Two others joined us for bowling, so there were eight of us at the alley, seven of us bowling. We had a great time and a lot of laughs were had by all. JN and her single friend JL were there, but came a little later to the alley from dinner. I was hoping they would get there soon as I enjoy hanging out with the guys more than I should probably admit, but the testosterone levels of four guys to little 'ole me was pretty high!
JL and I had met a few other times in the past and she rubbed me wrong the first time I met her. I'm sure she is a lot of fun, we are just entirely two different people. She's all about action and well, I'm so not. So JL was reveling in all of the available men and wondered what the story was. I suppose she and I not knowing each other it looked rather strange, especially given the first time we met earlier this summer she asked, "What type of guys are you interested in?" and I responded with "None." She then asked if I was a lesbian which I said no. I had just gotten out of a relationship and I wasn't interested in dating, picking up or shacking up with anyone that evening or anytime soon. So her impression last night probably only added fuel to the fire. Who knows.
It did make me laugh when she said, "Can I ask you a question?" "Are there any of these guys that aren't in love with you?" I informed her that none of them were in love with me. She only raised her one eyebrow and smirked at me. She then asked which guy I was dating. Which my answer was again, "none". Isn't it OK to have male friends and that they are just friends? Apparently not to her, nor did she seem to believe my answers as her next comment was, "So can I have your leftovers?" Seriously, she DID NOT just say that! All you girlfriend, no leftovers and as a matter of fact, all of these men are good fine men and regardless of their consumption of alcohol...you left the alley alone, being laughed at and without a single phone number.
Honestly, it was sad. If she could change her perception of men and appreciate them for who they are and not just a piece of ass, she might actually do better. But the reality she's getting more ass than I am, by choice, and we are both happy with who we are!
We also had an entertaining conversation during the night as I brought up Cindy Crawford's recent interview about how she would rather be a MILF than a Cougar. JL wanted to know the difference, thinking that they could be one in the same. Further stating that I was both, even though she said that she wasn't a lesbian she could see even herself falling in love with me. Sigh, seriously. PM then thought about the concept of the two for a few minutes and said, "I can see you one week as a MILF and the next as a Cougar. Bouncing back and forth between the two."
Interesting. It's always amusing and often times entertaining to see how others view yourself, whether you agree with their perception or not. Clearly, if these people feel that I possess the skills or power as they see it, I definitely don't use that power. Although there were a group of young early twenties guys bowling that I went and chatted with about picking music off the juke box. I found them staring at me through the night, but the real reason? I'm sure they were laughing at this "old lady"! It's all good, I was too!
Two others joined us for bowling, so there were eight of us at the alley, seven of us bowling. We had a great time and a lot of laughs were had by all. JN and her single friend JL were there, but came a little later to the alley from dinner. I was hoping they would get there soon as I enjoy hanging out with the guys more than I should probably admit, but the testosterone levels of four guys to little 'ole me was pretty high!
JL and I had met a few other times in the past and she rubbed me wrong the first time I met her. I'm sure she is a lot of fun, we are just entirely two different people. She's all about action and well, I'm so not. So JL was reveling in all of the available men and wondered what the story was. I suppose she and I not knowing each other it looked rather strange, especially given the first time we met earlier this summer she asked, "What type of guys are you interested in?" and I responded with "None." She then asked if I was a lesbian which I said no. I had just gotten out of a relationship and I wasn't interested in dating, picking up or shacking up with anyone that evening or anytime soon. So her impression last night probably only added fuel to the fire. Who knows.
It did make me laugh when she said, "Can I ask you a question?" "Are there any of these guys that aren't in love with you?" I informed her that none of them were in love with me. She only raised her one eyebrow and smirked at me. She then asked which guy I was dating. Which my answer was again, "none". Isn't it OK to have male friends and that they are just friends? Apparently not to her, nor did she seem to believe my answers as her next comment was, "So can I have your leftovers?" Seriously, she DID NOT just say that! All you girlfriend, no leftovers and as a matter of fact, all of these men are good fine men and regardless of their consumption of alcohol...you left the alley alone, being laughed at and without a single phone number.
Honestly, it was sad. If she could change her perception of men and appreciate them for who they are and not just a piece of ass, she might actually do better. But the reality she's getting more ass than I am, by choice, and we are both happy with who we are!
We also had an entertaining conversation during the night as I brought up Cindy Crawford's recent interview about how she would rather be a MILF than a Cougar. JL wanted to know the difference, thinking that they could be one in the same. Further stating that I was both, even though she said that she wasn't a lesbian she could see even herself falling in love with me. Sigh, seriously. PM then thought about the concept of the two for a few minutes and said, "I can see you one week as a MILF and the next as a Cougar. Bouncing back and forth between the two."
Interesting. It's always amusing and often times entertaining to see how others view yourself, whether you agree with their perception or not. Clearly, if these people feel that I possess the skills or power as they see it, I definitely don't use that power. Although there were a group of young early twenties guys bowling that I went and chatted with about picking music off the juke box. I found them staring at me through the night, but the real reason? I'm sure they were laughing at this "old lady"! It's all good, I was too!
Friday, December 11, 2009
Date Night
Last night was "date night". I picked up T after practice and gave him several options of where we would go to dinner. His first choice was Subway, which was not one of the given options. Although truth be known, we both would have been completely happy and satisfied! He did pick one of the nicer restaurants in town, which was en route to our next destination.
I haven't been to the restaurant in years. I used to go frequently, as I had a never ending gift card. Finally the last time I went, we had an all out hurrah and managed to spend close to $80 for two adults and think that only included one drink! The restaurant is divided into two sections, a fancy linen table cloth side with candles and then the casual side - table only. Although both provide the exact same menu. The hostess did ask where I preferred to sit, and as more of a social experiment, I let her choose.
Not surprisingly, we were seated on the casual side. We were the only table on that side for our waitress and we were often neglected as she was busy with the other side. We had a good meal and the company was fabulous.
Next we headed to our annual pre-Christmas date location where T makes a Christmas gift for Grandma. We enjoyed each other's company, mostly in silence, as we both worked diligently on our pieces of art. Mine was for T and I asked him several questions about it, but then did what I wanted. He would comment several times, "That looks cool Mom! But don't worry, I didn't look!"
T and I have lots of time that we spend together, since of course it is just he and I. But sometimes, caught up in the daily routines, we forget to cherish each other. To take time and do things out of the ordinary. To go above and beyond, sometimes in elegance and sometimes in the most simplistic measures. All treasures of a lifetime.
I haven't been to the restaurant in years. I used to go frequently, as I had a never ending gift card. Finally the last time I went, we had an all out hurrah and managed to spend close to $80 for two adults and think that only included one drink! The restaurant is divided into two sections, a fancy linen table cloth side with candles and then the casual side - table only. Although both provide the exact same menu. The hostess did ask where I preferred to sit, and as more of a social experiment, I let her choose.
Not surprisingly, we were seated on the casual side. We were the only table on that side for our waitress and we were often neglected as she was busy with the other side. We had a good meal and the company was fabulous.
Next we headed to our annual pre-Christmas date location where T makes a Christmas gift for Grandma. We enjoyed each other's company, mostly in silence, as we both worked diligently on our pieces of art. Mine was for T and I asked him several questions about it, but then did what I wanted. He would comment several times, "That looks cool Mom! But don't worry, I didn't look!"
T and I have lots of time that we spend together, since of course it is just he and I. But sometimes, caught up in the daily routines, we forget to cherish each other. To take time and do things out of the ordinary. To go above and beyond, sometimes in elegance and sometimes in the most simplistic measures. All treasures of a lifetime.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Snow Blower & Karma
On 3/21/08 I posted why I felt my snow blower (s) is a male here. I still feel the same way today.
This morning fortunately we only had about 1.5-2" of snow. I went out to start either of my Torro 200 snow throwers, neither which obliged. Even after mixing together the 32:1 oil and gas and filling both up. Running short of time, so very common for me, I decided to bail on the clearing of the drive and came in and got ready for work.
I left work early and came home to try to start either one of them, again. I couldn't start either, not even a gag or a sputter. I pulled out the ladder and plugged in the electrical cord to start either of them with the electric starter. Why two you ask? Neither one is fully functioning, so I got a duplicate thrower from my step-dad and I could choose which one I liked better, but determining that in the fall of 2008 was pretty hard, without snow of course. So I still have both of them. Anyway...
Electric starting didn't work. So, I shoveled the driveway. I managed to freeze my fingers and legs, while shoveling and was thankful that there wasn't more snow. I was also extremely thankful that I offered to pay my son to clear the driveway of the slush and water the day before, making today easier. When I was all done, my next door neighbor came out and asked if I had used my snow blower in the morning. Nope. He suggested that the fuel line had probably dried up if I hadn't used it recently.
Seriously. Is one really suppose to use a snow blower in the fall? Where did I miss that lesson that if one doesn't have a leaf blower and chooses not to mow over their leaves, be sure to use your snow blower? Where was the manual on that info? He did advise that I might need a fuel injector or to just add some gas to the spark plug and it/they should be fine. Sure, easier said than done, IF I knew how to locate the spark plug!
I did go back into the garage and played around with the first one again. And after minutes...it fired up...and then died. I started it up again. Same thing. Third time, it stayed running. I ran it down the driveway just to get run the gas through the line, even though the only thing it was throwing around was dirt!
Maybe it was...karma. That we get too reliant on the conveniences of life. That sometimes, it really is better for us - physically, emotionally and mentally to do things the long or harder way. That way, we can sit back and appreciate things more. To not take things for granted.
Having said that, all be damned if I have to shovel the driveway again this season! If I have more issues, it will be time to invest in some massive machinery that will shoot snow four houses down. Because it's all about..."Go Big or Stay Home". And, if I don't go big, staying home because I'll be buried in my garage is about all I'll be doing this winter!
This morning fortunately we only had about 1.5-2" of snow. I went out to start either of my Torro 200 snow throwers, neither which obliged. Even after mixing together the 32:1 oil and gas and filling both up. Running short of time, so very common for me, I decided to bail on the clearing of the drive and came in and got ready for work.
I left work early and came home to try to start either one of them, again. I couldn't start either, not even a gag or a sputter. I pulled out the ladder and plugged in the electrical cord to start either of them with the electric starter. Why two you ask? Neither one is fully functioning, so I got a duplicate thrower from my step-dad and I could choose which one I liked better, but determining that in the fall of 2008 was pretty hard, without snow of course. So I still have both of them. Anyway...
Electric starting didn't work. So, I shoveled the driveway. I managed to freeze my fingers and legs, while shoveling and was thankful that there wasn't more snow. I was also extremely thankful that I offered to pay my son to clear the driveway of the slush and water the day before, making today easier. When I was all done, my next door neighbor came out and asked if I had used my snow blower in the morning. Nope. He suggested that the fuel line had probably dried up if I hadn't used it recently.
Seriously. Is one really suppose to use a snow blower in the fall? Where did I miss that lesson that if one doesn't have a leaf blower and chooses not to mow over their leaves, be sure to use your snow blower? Where was the manual on that info? He did advise that I might need a fuel injector or to just add some gas to the spark plug and it/they should be fine. Sure, easier said than done, IF I knew how to locate the spark plug!
I did go back into the garage and played around with the first one again. And after minutes...it fired up...and then died. I started it up again. Same thing. Third time, it stayed running. I ran it down the driveway just to get run the gas through the line, even though the only thing it was throwing around was dirt!
Maybe it was...karma. That we get too reliant on the conveniences of life. That sometimes, it really is better for us - physically, emotionally and mentally to do things the long or harder way. That way, we can sit back and appreciate things more. To not take things for granted.
Having said that, all be damned if I have to shovel the driveway again this season! If I have more issues, it will be time to invest in some massive machinery that will shoot snow four houses down. Because it's all about..."Go Big or Stay Home". And, if I don't go big, staying home because I'll be buried in my garage is about all I'll be doing this winter!
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
No School Day - Where was the snow?
School was canceled today! And the roads...were fine.
I think it was a preemptive measure to predict that the weather was going to be bad.
Additionally, the "blizzard" is coming. It has been looming since 1p.m. and yet not bothered to arrive. Don't get me wrong, I'm clearly not complaining. Had the weather been bad, I couldn't have flown through my Christmas shopping, hitting five places in less than an hour across town!
I only wonder what the evening and tomorrow will bring. I wonder if it was just the first opportunity for schools to use one of their many reserve "snow days".
On a serious note though, I do hope that the weather holds off. My aunt is scheduled to have open heart surgery tomorrow. Many family members are traveling across the country and I hope and pray that everything goes well, with my aunt and all of the travelers. My thoughts and prayers, always.
I think it was a preemptive measure to predict that the weather was going to be bad.
Additionally, the "blizzard" is coming. It has been looming since 1p.m. and yet not bothered to arrive. Don't get me wrong, I'm clearly not complaining. Had the weather been bad, I couldn't have flown through my Christmas shopping, hitting five places in less than an hour across town!
I only wonder what the evening and tomorrow will bring. I wonder if it was just the first opportunity for schools to use one of their many reserve "snow days".
On a serious note though, I do hope that the weather holds off. My aunt is scheduled to have open heart surgery tomorrow. Many family members are traveling across the country and I hope and pray that everything goes well, with my aunt and all of the travelers. My thoughts and prayers, always.
Christmas Shopping?....DONE
With my second venture out and another hour, my Christmas shopping is officially DONE. Nine people and of course myself, all bought for in two hours. How to maximize the shopping experience and still not buy a single thing online!
Of course now I just have to wrap, pack and ship several and hope that I manage to do that before Christmas!
DEEP SIGH...
What a relief to know that shopping is done! Nothing else out there looming. No last minute gifts that I must get. No crowds to navigate.
Now it's just time to sit back and enjoy. With the exception of the shopping for Christmas dinner and the packing and shopping for my vacation. And, and, and...but the Christmas shopping is DONE.
Can it get any better than this?
Of course now I just have to wrap, pack and ship several and hope that I manage to do that before Christmas!
DEEP SIGH...
What a relief to know that shopping is done! Nothing else out there looming. No last minute gifts that I must get. No crowds to navigate.
Now it's just time to sit back and enjoy. With the exception of the shopping for Christmas dinner and the packing and shopping for my vacation. And, and, and...but the Christmas shopping is DONE.
Can it get any better than this?
Can't We All Be Friends?
Sometimes I wonder if it's really possible to be friends with everyone or anyone for that matter. Clearly no one is friends with everyone or no one. But is it ultimately possible for all of your own friends to get along? Is it wishful thinking to think that people that have a common denominator, you, may be able to get along in one place?
I think in my unrealistic world, I think it's possible. I do think it's possible to be friends with ex's. Difficult, yes. Impossible, no.
One lesson my mom always taught me (which I am completely guilty of NOT following - but always thinking and considering) is that you invite everyone, regardless. It is better to have invited than to have excluded. Let them be the one to determine that they don't want (to go, to participate, to be involved, etc.), then for you to make that decision for someone else.
I am completely guilty of exclusion. I try hard not to, but I am. I often think that it's best for the other person to not have to feel pressured or put on the spot in a possibly awkward situation. Or, when I know that they would want to but other commitments make it difficult.
Just this afternoon, I didn't include someone in something as mundane as signing Christmas cards. I didn't think he would want to be bothered, he is afterall The Top Dog. At the suggestion of a co-worker, I asked him if he wanted to sign them, he did.
It isn't just about the season of giving. It is about being conscious about other's feelings and beliefs but knowing that we can't know what is best for someone else or what they would want, without asking them.
Although, is there times, when maybe it isn't best to be all inclusive? When it might not be the best idea to invite, say everyone? In the past I've managed to have "game nights" at my home and several of my ex's whom I am friends with, have all come - some solo, some with their new partners. It's never awkward for me. I suppose what it boils down to is everyone is an adult and they are responsible for their own feelings and actions, as am I. But...
Stay tuned to see how the drama may unfold and I can revel in what I should or could have done, after the fact of course!
I think in my unrealistic world, I think it's possible. I do think it's possible to be friends with ex's. Difficult, yes. Impossible, no.
One lesson my mom always taught me (which I am completely guilty of NOT following - but always thinking and considering) is that you invite everyone, regardless. It is better to have invited than to have excluded. Let them be the one to determine that they don't want (to go, to participate, to be involved, etc.), then for you to make that decision for someone else.
I am completely guilty of exclusion. I try hard not to, but I am. I often think that it's best for the other person to not have to feel pressured or put on the spot in a possibly awkward situation. Or, when I know that they would want to but other commitments make it difficult.
Just this afternoon, I didn't include someone in something as mundane as signing Christmas cards. I didn't think he would want to be bothered, he is afterall The Top Dog. At the suggestion of a co-worker, I asked him if he wanted to sign them, he did.
It isn't just about the season of giving. It is about being conscious about other's feelings and beliefs but knowing that we can't know what is best for someone else or what they would want, without asking them.
Although, is there times, when maybe it isn't best to be all inclusive? When it might not be the best idea to invite, say everyone? In the past I've managed to have "game nights" at my home and several of my ex's whom I am friends with, have all come - some solo, some with their new partners. It's never awkward for me. I suppose what it boils down to is everyone is an adult and they are responsible for their own feelings and actions, as am I. But...
Stay tuned to see how the drama may unfold and I can revel in what I should or could have done, after the fact of course!
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
(Anti) Christmas Photos
I blogged recently about my Christmas decorating, and I finally bothered to take a few pictures. Essentially, the inside of the house is rather festive, for the most part.
Doesn't every sport enthusiast need football lights hanging on their mantel?
But clearly from the outside of my house, with my futile attempt to strand "purple" lights in the front windows, my house looks...ANTI-CHRISTMAS? Agree or Disagree?
Volunteering vs. Dating
I'm again back on the thought of volunteering. I want to give back to the community somehow and find myself more productive. I want to encourage my son to interact more and also volunteer. A while back, I did brief research on different options and didn't really come up with much that I was interested or intrigued. In my mind today, I thought that if we committed to one evening a week to volunteer, either at a Mission or Shelter or something, that maybe we would have some type of impact. Either personally or with someone else.
I feel like volunteering is a lot like dating. You have to be willing to commit yourself to something or someone or possibly even someones. You have to be willing to give up self sacrifice either for someone else or for your own personal gains. Or...maybe you don't have to do either, just be willing to share or give of your time and whatever happens, happens. But regardless, it's a committment. Neither necessarily have to be a specific committment of your time, but both would probably fare better if they were, at least for scheduling and consistency purposes.
My son's basketball season is wrapping up. He has one week left and then, I think, we are sport free until the conditioning pre-baseball season which will likely begin sometime in February or March at the very latest. So the reality is, we could commit to possibly two-three months of a nightly volunteer opportunity without the possibility of conflict of another sport. Any time is better than none, isn't it? Or is it?
If you can't commit to something, if you can't give of your time or yourself completely or to a level of acceptance, do you offer your time at all? Do you start something that you have no intention of ever finishing (and this isn't referencing eating by any means!)?
Maybe it's time to just revel in the fact that we don't have to DO. That we can take a couple of months off and enjoy ourselves, each other and anything we want to do, without making a committment to do.
And maybe during that time we can learn, grow and become better for having done so.
I feel like volunteering is a lot like dating. You have to be willing to commit yourself to something or someone or possibly even someones. You have to be willing to give up self sacrifice either for someone else or for your own personal gains. Or...maybe you don't have to do either, just be willing to share or give of your time and whatever happens, happens. But regardless, it's a committment. Neither necessarily have to be a specific committment of your time, but both would probably fare better if they were, at least for scheduling and consistency purposes.
My son's basketball season is wrapping up. He has one week left and then, I think, we are sport free until the conditioning pre-baseball season which will likely begin sometime in February or March at the very latest. So the reality is, we could commit to possibly two-three months of a nightly volunteer opportunity without the possibility of conflict of another sport. Any time is better than none, isn't it? Or is it?
If you can't commit to something, if you can't give of your time or yourself completely or to a level of acceptance, do you offer your time at all? Do you start something that you have no intention of ever finishing (and this isn't referencing eating by any means!)?
Maybe it's time to just revel in the fact that we don't have to DO. That we can take a couple of months off and enjoy ourselves, each other and anything we want to do, without making a committment to do.
And maybe during that time we can learn, grow and become better for having done so.
Monday, December 7, 2009
'Tis the Season
With much procrastination, shortly after 9p.m. last night, I managed to have my house completely decorated for Christmas. Seeing that I don't have the outside electrical outlet, it doesn't really warrant my ability to hang outside lights. Otherwise, T and I thought it would be great to put DITTO on our house like the one going around the internet. Unfortunately, across the street is the only one with decent lights on and they aren't overkill.
I put "purple" lights in my two bedroom front windows. I hung them in an X; however, when I looked at them from the street they are more of a pinkish-red and look like I am hosting the anti-Christmas house with not one, but two X's. Oh well, thought that counts, right?
I hadn't managed to begin any of my Christmas shopping. Personally, with each Christmas I lean more and more toward doing away with gift giving for the family since it turns into a swapping of gift cards. I'd rather keep my money and buy myself what I want and they can do the same. Generic, unholy, unholiday-like...ABSOLUTELY. And you know what? I'm OK with that!
I'm still leaning toward a couple gift cards, out of mere convenience than anything else. But I will accompany them with smaller gifts and get them shipped off, and preferably before Christmas. I bought my son several gifts today as well as my mom and finished up my nephews!
So now that the house is decorated, my vacation is underway for the holidays, I'm beginning to almost feel Christmas like. I have a family that I work with that I was hoping to reimburse money for some home repairs. Due to the politics of the job, I personally would like to pay them out of my own pocket, I just need to figure out how they won't know it's from me. I think I may just get them a "visa" card or gift cards to the local grocer rather than money. I have another family that needs a crib. I offered today to give them mine, which I didn't sell in a garage sale a few years ago. Afterall, at 35 with a 12 year old and no interest to adopt or foster anymore, I won't be needing it! Then I will go through more of my son's old clothes and give a friend and co-worker clothes for her son.
'Tis the Season!
Why is it so easy to want to give to those less fortunate or appreciative than to "buy" or give to family members for the holidays?
I put "purple" lights in my two bedroom front windows. I hung them in an X; however, when I looked at them from the street they are more of a pinkish-red and look like I am hosting the anti-Christmas house with not one, but two X's. Oh well, thought that counts, right?
I hadn't managed to begin any of my Christmas shopping. Personally, with each Christmas I lean more and more toward doing away with gift giving for the family since it turns into a swapping of gift cards. I'd rather keep my money and buy myself what I want and they can do the same. Generic, unholy, unholiday-like...ABSOLUTELY. And you know what? I'm OK with that!
I'm still leaning toward a couple gift cards, out of mere convenience than anything else. But I will accompany them with smaller gifts and get them shipped off, and preferably before Christmas. I bought my son several gifts today as well as my mom and finished up my nephews!
So now that the house is decorated, my vacation is underway for the holidays, I'm beginning to almost feel Christmas like. I have a family that I work with that I was hoping to reimburse money for some home repairs. Due to the politics of the job, I personally would like to pay them out of my own pocket, I just need to figure out how they won't know it's from me. I think I may just get them a "visa" card or gift cards to the local grocer rather than money. I have another family that needs a crib. I offered today to give them mine, which I didn't sell in a garage sale a few years ago. Afterall, at 35 with a 12 year old and no interest to adopt or foster anymore, I won't be needing it! Then I will go through more of my son's old clothes and give a friend and co-worker clothes for her son.
'Tis the Season!
Why is it so easy to want to give to those less fortunate or appreciative than to "buy" or give to family members for the holidays?
Warren Miller Movie Night
Saturday night was Warren Miller Movie Night! The kickoff to a great ski season, here in Michigan. Also the first weekend of snow in Southwest Michigan.
I was pretty excited to be going to the movie, mainly for the "freebies" and the "swag" of ski discounts and whathaveyou. I called good friends of mine late in the week and learned that they already had their tickets to the earlier show. They were interested in meeting us for dinner when their show ended. There were seven of us for dinner and six of us for the movie, as we lost the two from dinner and gained one solely for the movie and the dessert/drinks after.
Pre-purchasing tickets were only $12.00. Can I say well worth it! I can even say that without all the free stuff! The company in and of itself was fun and we had a great time. The peanut throwing and conversation afterward over drinks and desserts was a blast as well!
Here's what I (and T) managed to collect of ski deals along with the free t-shirt that was catapulted right next to me that landed on the floor within my reach. Unfortunately none of us one any of the fabulous prizes of trips and getaways, but that's OK. We can't all be winners!
Caberfae Peaks $9 Lift Tickets (5) Sunday - Friday
(Bill & Paul's in Grand Rapids has historically had coupons too for $9 Sundays)
Bittersweet Ski Resort Free Pass (2) Monday - Thursday
Timber Ridge Free Lift Ticket (2) Monday - Thursday
Shanty Creek Resorts (2) $6 Superticket Monday - Friday (or 2 for 1 Saturday - Sunday)
Boyne Mountain or Boyne Highlands 2 for 1
Haven't checked out my other free "swag" and deals with our online codes. I think I have enough discount ski deals to last me through the season and to burn a couple sick, I mean vacation days!
I also purchased a Seasons Pass to Colorado last week to the Arapahoe Basin A which provides me with five days of skiing at Keystone/Breckenridge. I picked up a few entertainment and coupon books that might offer any other discount ski options for January as well. I received my email confirmation for my flight today too!
It's officially...TIME TO SKI!
I was pretty excited to be going to the movie, mainly for the "freebies" and the "swag" of ski discounts and whathaveyou. I called good friends of mine late in the week and learned that they already had their tickets to the earlier show. They were interested in meeting us for dinner when their show ended. There were seven of us for dinner and six of us for the movie, as we lost the two from dinner and gained one solely for the movie and the dessert/drinks after.
Pre-purchasing tickets were only $12.00. Can I say well worth it! I can even say that without all the free stuff! The company in and of itself was fun and we had a great time. The peanut throwing and conversation afterward over drinks and desserts was a blast as well!
Here's what I (and T) managed to collect of ski deals along with the free t-shirt that was catapulted right next to me that landed on the floor within my reach. Unfortunately none of us one any of the fabulous prizes of trips and getaways, but that's OK. We can't all be winners!
Caberfae Peaks $9 Lift Tickets (5) Sunday - Friday
(Bill & Paul's in Grand Rapids has historically had coupons too for $9 Sundays)
Bittersweet Ski Resort Free Pass (2) Monday - Thursday
Timber Ridge Free Lift Ticket (2) Monday - Thursday
Shanty Creek Resorts (2) $6 Superticket Monday - Friday (or 2 for 1 Saturday - Sunday)
Boyne Mountain or Boyne Highlands 2 for 1
Haven't checked out my other free "swag" and deals with our online codes. I think I have enough discount ski deals to last me through the season and to burn a couple sick, I mean vacation days!
I also purchased a Seasons Pass to Colorado last week to the Arapahoe Basin A which provides me with five days of skiing at Keystone/Breckenridge. I picked up a few entertainment and coupon books that might offer any other discount ski options for January as well. I received my email confirmation for my flight today too!
It's officially...TIME TO SKI!
Friday, December 4, 2009
Metaphors, Signs & Timing
The past month has been a rather whirlwind. I never would have thought that just a short month ago I would have met someone that entered quickly into my life and left even more quickly. Again, everything happens for a reason, whether we understand initially or not.
This morning I was reflecting, as I typically do. For some reason, I realize that I was missing the emotional connection. It could have been that things were going very quickly and I just went along for the ride, or it could have been something else. Or maybe I was emotionally connected and once that was shattered, there wasn't enough time to go back and pick up the pieces.
On my way to work, the one and only song I heard was Kelly Clarkson's song, Already Gone. Is that a sign? Especially given that had I missed that song and heard the songs in the playlist after, it would have represented something completely different.
Sometimes it's about the metaphors. Sitting on my desk, was my bowl from my breakfast yesterday morning, crusty oatmeal. I knew yesterday that I should have cleaned it. I should have, but I didn't. So this morning, without the proper tools, I was scrubbing the bowl clean with soap, luke warm water and my fingers. I did manage to get the bowl clean and made breakfast again this morning; however, had I taken care of cleaning it at the time, there would have been less time, effort and clean up required. I can only imagine how difficult it may have been had I let the bowl sit there for days without cleaning or attention.
It's amazing how there are so many similarities and metaphors throughout our lives. How little things that we can do today can save so much time, energy and heartache tomorrow. While it's true, don't sweat the small stuff and let go of which you can't control, take care today what you may want to put off until tomorrow. Because, tomorrow may never come.
This morning I was reflecting, as I typically do. For some reason, I realize that I was missing the emotional connection. It could have been that things were going very quickly and I just went along for the ride, or it could have been something else. Or maybe I was emotionally connected and once that was shattered, there wasn't enough time to go back and pick up the pieces.
On my way to work, the one and only song I heard was Kelly Clarkson's song, Already Gone. Is that a sign? Especially given that had I missed that song and heard the songs in the playlist after, it would have represented something completely different.
Sometimes it's about the metaphors. Sitting on my desk, was my bowl from my breakfast yesterday morning, crusty oatmeal. I knew yesterday that I should have cleaned it. I should have, but I didn't. So this morning, without the proper tools, I was scrubbing the bowl clean with soap, luke warm water and my fingers. I did manage to get the bowl clean and made breakfast again this morning; however, had I taken care of cleaning it at the time, there would have been less time, effort and clean up required. I can only imagine how difficult it may have been had I let the bowl sit there for days without cleaning or attention.
It's amazing how there are so many similarities and metaphors throughout our lives. How little things that we can do today can save so much time, energy and heartache tomorrow. While it's true, don't sweat the small stuff and let go of which you can't control, take care today what you may want to put off until tomorrow. Because, tomorrow may never come.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Missed Opportunity
It's the middle of basketball season. My son is on the "B" team, although it was never truly identified how the teams were created. Both the "A" and the "B" team have similar records, significantly more losses than wins, albeit bitter than the Detroit Lions record no doubt!
This week my son had three games, two which were away. I missed his first game of the season last night, having other commitments and not wanting to make the one hour trek each way for a four period game of six minutes each. My son scored the winning point, in a real nail-biting game where he found himself on the free throw line with the score tied. He made one shot and that secured the win since neither team scored in the final remaining minutes of the game! He scored several points in the game, with one foul, several steals and a few rebounds. T is an all around good sport and regardless of their frequent losses, he can marvel when he has a good game and be disappointed when he didn't play so well. To make matters worse in my absence, tonight one of the parents addressed me after the game to confirm how "awesome" T was the day before. Figures, I always seem to miss out!
Tonight they lost to a team they had beat just weeks before. Call it revenge. There were a couple poor officiating moments, but clearly to be expected of seventh grade ball. T managed to score five points and several rebounds. But in addition to his points, he suffered three jammed fingers and a banged up knee to an already bruised knee from two days prior. Welcome to sports! At least he has until next week to go at it again!
This week my son had three games, two which were away. I missed his first game of the season last night, having other commitments and not wanting to make the one hour trek each way for a four period game of six minutes each. My son scored the winning point, in a real nail-biting game where he found himself on the free throw line with the score tied. He made one shot and that secured the win since neither team scored in the final remaining minutes of the game! He scored several points in the game, with one foul, several steals and a few rebounds. T is an all around good sport and regardless of their frequent losses, he can marvel when he has a good game and be disappointed when he didn't play so well. To make matters worse in my absence, tonight one of the parents addressed me after the game to confirm how "awesome" T was the day before. Figures, I always seem to miss out!
Tonight they lost to a team they had beat just weeks before. Call it revenge. There were a couple poor officiating moments, but clearly to be expected of seventh grade ball. T managed to score five points and several rebounds. But in addition to his points, he suffered three jammed fingers and a banged up knee to an already bruised knee from two days prior. Welcome to sports! At least he has until next week to go at it again!
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Holidays...
It isn't that I'm not fond of the holidays, with the exception of Hallmark holidays that is. For the most part, as a single parent for the past twelve years, the actual date of a specific holiday is completely irrelevant. It's about spending time with family and enjoying them when you can, if you can.
Most often, I'm thankful for a lot of things. Much too many to even begin to list them all here. I didn't have a formal Thanksgiving dinner with my family this year, but saw them all the weekend before, allbeit briefly. They were not far from my thoughts, prayers and well wishes.
Christmas holidays are usually the worst for the bouncing back and forth visitation. Typically we celebrate Christmas in the month of December, but not always on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. Logistics people, logistics.
Seeing that it is now officially December, and early December at that, I have already finalized Christmas plans. My parents agreed to come in to visit us, which justifies that we should really decorate the house for Christmas. But for the first time that I can recall in a long time, if ever, I'm going to be out of town for the holidays. I purchased my plane ticket this morning and it's a done deal.
I'm looking forward to new experiences and adventures! And I wish you and yours a fabulous holiday season!
Most often, I'm thankful for a lot of things. Much too many to even begin to list them all here. I didn't have a formal Thanksgiving dinner with my family this year, but saw them all the weekend before, allbeit briefly. They were not far from my thoughts, prayers and well wishes.
Christmas holidays are usually the worst for the bouncing back and forth visitation. Typically we celebrate Christmas in the month of December, but not always on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. Logistics people, logistics.
Seeing that it is now officially December, and early December at that, I have already finalized Christmas plans. My parents agreed to come in to visit us, which justifies that we should really decorate the house for Christmas. But for the first time that I can recall in a long time, if ever, I'm going to be out of town for the holidays. I purchased my plane ticket this morning and it's a done deal.
I'm looking forward to new experiences and adventures! And I wish you and yours a fabulous holiday season!
Scorpio
I'm a Scorpio. Yes, for those of you who weren't aware, it is true. And I'm sure for those of you who actually know me, this comes as no surprise.
This morning I received an email from my friend about their horoscope. I decided to take a little quiz to see how many characteristics I have of a "True Scorpio". According to www.lifescript.com : "You have several Scorpio characteristics, but you are lacking common Scorpio traits such as the need to control other people or intense jealousy. Your nature is more easygoing and trusting. You still possess that Scorpio persistence and intuition, however."
Not that I think a ten question quiz can completely pinpoint my personality or anything, but something I find remotely entertaining nonetheless. Here's the breakdown of a Scorpio:
"Scorpio is suspicious of other people's intentions and motives. You rarely open up to someone until you are certain you can trust him or her.
Scorpio is attracted to power and can be quite opportunistic. You believe that everyone in your life has a specific purpose to helping you achieve your objectives.
Scorpio is the most jealous sign of the zodiac. You demand complete loyalty from a partner and will not tolerate a partner who is flirtatious.
Although Scorpios tend to pry into other people's lives, they dislike anyone intruding into their personal business. You are extremely secretive and find it difficult to open up to anyone.
The Scorpio person is determined and also quite competitive. You enjoy a challenge and always finish what you start.
Scorpios can be loners. You don't like to seek out other people and have a hard time relating to others because of your inability to open up.
The Scorpio person is ambitious and determined. Once you have decided on a goal, you rarely give up until you have achieved what you set out to do.
Scorpios are intuitive to the point of being psychic. You usually read situations and people correctly and rely on this ability to help you make decisions.
Scorpios have a deep-seated need to be in control. When you are not in control of a situation, you become stubborn and uncooperative.
Like the other two water signs, Cancer and Pisces, Scorpios tend to be emotional. However, unlike Cancer and Pisces, you hide this trait extremely well. You are sometimes perceived as cold and insensitive due to your apparent lack of emotion."
Do you possess the characteristics of your zodiac?
This morning I received an email from my friend about their horoscope. I decided to take a little quiz to see how many characteristics I have of a "True Scorpio". According to www.lifescript.com : "You have several Scorpio characteristics, but you are lacking common Scorpio traits such as the need to control other people or intense jealousy. Your nature is more easygoing and trusting. You still possess that Scorpio persistence and intuition, however."
Not that I think a ten question quiz can completely pinpoint my personality or anything, but something I find remotely entertaining nonetheless. Here's the breakdown of a Scorpio:
"Scorpio is suspicious of other people's intentions and motives. You rarely open up to someone until you are certain you can trust him or her.
Scorpio is attracted to power and can be quite opportunistic. You believe that everyone in your life has a specific purpose to helping you achieve your objectives.
Scorpio is the most jealous sign of the zodiac. You demand complete loyalty from a partner and will not tolerate a partner who is flirtatious.
Although Scorpios tend to pry into other people's lives, they dislike anyone intruding into their personal business. You are extremely secretive and find it difficult to open up to anyone.
The Scorpio person is determined and also quite competitive. You enjoy a challenge and always finish what you start.
Scorpios can be loners. You don't like to seek out other people and have a hard time relating to others because of your inability to open up.
The Scorpio person is ambitious and determined. Once you have decided on a goal, you rarely give up until you have achieved what you set out to do.
Scorpios are intuitive to the point of being psychic. You usually read situations and people correctly and rely on this ability to help you make decisions.
Scorpios have a deep-seated need to be in control. When you are not in control of a situation, you become stubborn and uncooperative.
Like the other two water signs, Cancer and Pisces, Scorpios tend to be emotional. However, unlike Cancer and Pisces, you hide this trait extremely well. You are sometimes perceived as cold and insensitive due to your apparent lack of emotion."
Do you possess the characteristics of your zodiac?
Living Life & Vacation
Last week I posted on Facebook, "When you least expect it and you become blindsided...become road kill, or pick yourself up, dust yourself off and carry on a little better for the wear and tear."
I received many concerned emails, comments and phone calls from that status update. It helped me to realize that there are people that genuinely care, care about me.
I meant what I said and I did pick myself up and I think that I've become stronger for the experience. I think that sometimes, people and events come into our lives for a reason. While that reason isn't always apparent from the get go, sometimes it's a lesson we learn or a realization we grasp after the fact.
As I sit here typing this, I am optimistic. I again feel like I am finding my own and making a decision to pave my own way. To again go back to the desire to be selfish and find self gratification. I've made plans with several friends I haven't seen in a while in the next week or two. I have things that I'm looking forward, although Christmas decorating and shopping aren't in that list!
I still can't believe that it is officially December. It has been a blessing that here in Southwest Michigan we have yet to see any snow. I really don't mind the snow - it's the other drivers and the plowing that I can do without. I'm getting excited about going to Colorado in January. I still need to use my free roundtrip airfare before April and was considering going somewhere between Christmas and New Years as my son should be with his dad during that time.
Tonight, the opportunity arose to go out to Colorado during that time. I could then purchase a seasons pass which would be cost effective for the possibility of almost two weeks of skiing. It almost seems surreal. Too good to be true. Can I really just throw caution in the wind and go? Why not? What is it that holds me back? Is it the fear of just taking the plunge or the fact that what if I get injured or the vacation time that I'm going to be taking or...OR WHAT?
I need to live my life and enjoy. If I don't live it, no one else is going to live it for me. Right? What do I have to lose? With so much to gain! Besides, when you realize that someone's friendship and yours in return causes happiness when maybe times have been difficult or trying as of late. When someone else is looking forward to your company and an adventure together and shares, "I think you're worth the extra effort especially if you keep causing me to smile like I have tonight ... it is amazing how one person can turn it all around. Thank you!" Just makes you thankful for friendship and that doors really do open when you least expect.
Maybe that horoscope was true afterall.
I received many concerned emails, comments and phone calls from that status update. It helped me to realize that there are people that genuinely care, care about me.
I meant what I said and I did pick myself up and I think that I've become stronger for the experience. I think that sometimes, people and events come into our lives for a reason. While that reason isn't always apparent from the get go, sometimes it's a lesson we learn or a realization we grasp after the fact.
As I sit here typing this, I am optimistic. I again feel like I am finding my own and making a decision to pave my own way. To again go back to the desire to be selfish and find self gratification. I've made plans with several friends I haven't seen in a while in the next week or two. I have things that I'm looking forward, although Christmas decorating and shopping aren't in that list!
I still can't believe that it is officially December. It has been a blessing that here in Southwest Michigan we have yet to see any snow. I really don't mind the snow - it's the other drivers and the plowing that I can do without. I'm getting excited about going to Colorado in January. I still need to use my free roundtrip airfare before April and was considering going somewhere between Christmas and New Years as my son should be with his dad during that time.
Tonight, the opportunity arose to go out to Colorado during that time. I could then purchase a seasons pass which would be cost effective for the possibility of almost two weeks of skiing. It almost seems surreal. Too good to be true. Can I really just throw caution in the wind and go? Why not? What is it that holds me back? Is it the fear of just taking the plunge or the fact that what if I get injured or the vacation time that I'm going to be taking or...OR WHAT?
I need to live my life and enjoy. If I don't live it, no one else is going to live it for me. Right? What do I have to lose? With so much to gain! Besides, when you realize that someone's friendship and yours in return causes happiness when maybe times have been difficult or trying as of late. When someone else is looking forward to your company and an adventure together and shares, "I think you're worth the extra effort especially if you keep causing me to smile like I have tonight ... it is amazing how one person can turn it all around. Thank you!" Just makes you thankful for friendship and that doors really do open when you least expect.
Maybe that horoscope was true afterall.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
True Love: The Boyfriend
Dating doesn't really seem to be my thing. Well let me clarify, a date with someone, once, is my thing. Seeing someone multiple times or getting into a relationship, not my thing. Never seems to fail, no matter how many I weed out due to blatantly obvious issues, there are always more hidden underneath someone that may seem normal and pretty issue free.
Clearly, I understand that I have issues. Hence the title of my blog, Independent Issues, lots of issues, independent of each other. Sometimes my own, sometimes my issues with things or others. Nonetheless, issues. I'm really willing to acknowledge my own shortcomings and I utilize life to the fullest on the learning curve and openly try to embrace change.
I suppose if you put together the masses of single people, everyone has their issues. It's just determining which issues are livable and forgivable with your own. And that has to be the hardest feat in and of itself.
For me, honesty, respect and communication are key. I think if you have truthful communication, almost anything can be overcome and achieved. I may be wrong, I suppose I have yet to find out.
Some say that when you least expect it and when you aren't looking, you will find true love. I haven't really been looking for a long time, but tonight was different. I think I've found my True Match, True Love.
"He always listens. He is never late. He smells good. He is always there for you. He doesn't watch too much TV."
Granted, I'm not sure about the communication aspect, but I suppose if he's a listener he can't be deceitful and dishonest. He won't blatantly look me in the eyes and tell me things that he really doesn't feel or felt for a fleeting minute. Somethings are worth compromising.
So tonight, while I wasn't looking for my True Love: The Ultimate Boyfriend...there he was. Hidden. Silent. Waiting. Longing with open arms...and while I'm not interested in jinxing my relationship by taking a picture with him...I'm willing to share him with YOU, Internet!
Clearly, I understand that I have issues. Hence the title of my blog, Independent Issues, lots of issues, independent of each other. Sometimes my own, sometimes my issues with things or others. Nonetheless, issues. I'm really willing to acknowledge my own shortcomings and I utilize life to the fullest on the learning curve and openly try to embrace change.
I suppose if you put together the masses of single people, everyone has their issues. It's just determining which issues are livable and forgivable with your own. And that has to be the hardest feat in and of itself.
For me, honesty, respect and communication are key. I think if you have truthful communication, almost anything can be overcome and achieved. I may be wrong, I suppose I have yet to find out.
Some say that when you least expect it and when you aren't looking, you will find true love. I haven't really been looking for a long time, but tonight was different. I think I've found my True Match, True Love.
"He always listens. He is never late. He smells good. He is always there for you. He doesn't watch too much TV."
Granted, I'm not sure about the communication aspect, but I suppose if he's a listener he can't be deceitful and dishonest. He won't blatantly look me in the eyes and tell me things that he really doesn't feel or felt for a fleeting minute. Somethings are worth compromising.
So tonight, while I wasn't looking for my True Love: The Ultimate Boyfriend...there he was. Hidden. Silent. Waiting. Longing with open arms...and while I'm not interested in jinxing my relationship by taking a picture with him...I'm willing to share him with YOU, Internet!
Can it get any better than that? He even "Grows 600% in 72 hours!"
Marital bliss...without the marriage...when I least expected! Love at last!
Weight Loss & Pants
I can't say that I have constantly struggled with weight loss, but clearly I would like to lose some additional weight - who wouldn't, right? Many years ago I made a personal goal that if I met my weight loss goal I would treat myself to a vacation to Aruba. I was never motivated enough to do so.
Whether I try or not, I can't seem to get but five pounds from my goal weight. Maybe I'm my own personal road block, that I can't part with the time or money to actually go to Aruba. Maybe I should change my reward! I'm again within five pounds, having gotten on the scale this morning and losing a few more pounds since before Thanksgiving. I still attribute a lot of the weight fluctuation with my inability to work out from the procedure two weeks ago. I'm sure it will all change, soon.
Just over a month ago, my mom and I went shopping. I purchased a lot of clothes that finally fit me. This morning, I grabbed a pair of dress pants from my closet and attempted to put them on. They seemed very tight and very short. I looked at whether or not I had the zipper all the way down as I grabbed leverage to pull them up to my waist. The thought of zipping the zipper was a completely different story!
I looked down and I could see my ankles. In a moment of shock and horror I wondered what in the world had happened. It's been years since I've had a dryer issue where I've shrunk my clothes. I really didn't think the scale had lied just minutes earlier! What in the world?
I pulled the pants off and looked at the tag. I was still in disbelief. I had no idea what pants I had tried on, but they weren't my new ones!
In looking at the tag, a light bulb finally went off! I had attempted to wear my twelve year old son's dress pants! Sigh, life really is good!
Happy Tuesday!
Whether I try or not, I can't seem to get but five pounds from my goal weight. Maybe I'm my own personal road block, that I can't part with the time or money to actually go to Aruba. Maybe I should change my reward! I'm again within five pounds, having gotten on the scale this morning and losing a few more pounds since before Thanksgiving. I still attribute a lot of the weight fluctuation with my inability to work out from the procedure two weeks ago. I'm sure it will all change, soon.
Just over a month ago, my mom and I went shopping. I purchased a lot of clothes that finally fit me. This morning, I grabbed a pair of dress pants from my closet and attempted to put them on. They seemed very tight and very short. I looked at whether or not I had the zipper all the way down as I grabbed leverage to pull them up to my waist. The thought of zipping the zipper was a completely different story!
I looked down and I could see my ankles. In a moment of shock and horror I wondered what in the world had happened. It's been years since I've had a dryer issue where I've shrunk my clothes. I really didn't think the scale had lied just minutes earlier! What in the world?
I pulled the pants off and looked at the tag. I was still in disbelief. I had no idea what pants I had tried on, but they weren't my new ones!
In looking at the tag, a light bulb finally went off! I had attempted to wear my twelve year old son's dress pants! Sigh, life really is good!
Happy Tuesday!
Horoscope 11/30/09
I've mentioned before, I'm really not all that into astrology. I find it entertaining and I do understand that there are a few zodiac signs that seem to be oil and vinegar with me, but besides that, it is what it is.
However, occasionally when I go through my emails, I will read my horoscope usually from the day before and some of them seem most appropriate. Here is my latest:
"You need to draw on your emotional depths to brave today's weird action -- but that's not such a a hard thing for you. In fact, you may come out of this much stronger than you were just yesterday."
However, occasionally when I go through my emails, I will read my horoscope usually from the day before and some of them seem most appropriate. Here is my latest:
"You need to draw on your emotional depths to brave today's weird action -- but that's not such a a hard thing for you. In fact, you may come out of this much stronger than you were just yesterday."
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