In a few days, I will leave the comforts and security of my home and town and go on vacation. I will be heading out to Summit County Colorado to ski.
I tuned my skis and I packed up my ski equipment. I will be flying out to Denver and will be picked up by a new friend to ski for the week. I met him online a few months ago for the sole purpose of him joining some friends and I in Colorado to share a condo in January. He seemed normal enough and I told him if he and anyone else wanted to join us, they could for the set amount of the week of the condo. He said that he was in and so was a friend of his.
A few weeks ago, he told me he was going out to Colorado for Christmas and he invited me to join him. I initially laughed at the idea, as did he. And within 24 hours, I utilized my free round trip airfare and am joining him on his adventure. At that point, I had only met him once. Since then, he and his female friend/roommate B have hung out with my friends and I several times. Other than the first time I met him, when I was later accompanied by a friend who joined us, I have never been alone with him. My friends all like him. I like him. He likes me.
He likes me for ME. He isn't in love with me. He doesn't want to date me. He doesn't covet me because I may have things that his ex doesn't have. He clearly enjoys my company and we have something in common, skiing.
He and B came over on Sunday night and picked up my skis and equipment. We talked for several hours before they left. B enlightened me that he is quite the extreme skier as he skis with a camel back, backpack and bungee cords. None of which I care to use. I prefer to live. I prefer to enjoy the groomed trails. I have no desire to meet my destiny with a tree. I have a son and I have a life which I love and would like to continue to live. I'm not about to bungee my skis to my back and hike up cliffs to extreme ski. I'm not going to find myself in areas where I will need to utilize water and snacks and other resources since I'm off the beaten path. I've told him that I can meet him at the bottom of the bunny hills! And, I'm really not joking. It's true that I've been skiing for 27 years. When I was a teenager I was much more extreme and adventurous, that was two knee surgeries and one child ago.
I have responsibilities. I have limits. In many ways I refuse to allow my limitations from holding me back from experiencing fun and living life; however, by no means will I throw caution to the wind and do something irresponsible and at risk. I am a mother first and foremost, whether he is with me or not. He can take any risk that he wants but I do not have to be part of all of them.
I do hope that we have a fabulous adventure. Of course I am nervous. Nervous to spend a week alone with someone that I barely know. Even spending a weekend with someone that I think I know has turned out badly. I can only hope that we not only tolerate each other but enjoy each other's company knowing that a friendship is growing and we hope to have many more adventures with each other. Maybe it's different with the expectations and drama that people have when there is nothing on the line. When there is nothing but two people with the same common goal - to go on vacation, to ski, to have fun and to enjoy someone else's company without the drama, trials and pitfall's of everyday life.
And with that, I'm figuratively jumping off the cliff and hoping to land into soft powder that will cushion my fall, freeze my hair and give me a permanent smile and memories of a lifetime!
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