Money, The Root of All Evil...

Or maybe just MY EVIL.

I'm not sure if I'm one in a million (clearly I believe that I'm not although my mom would likely say otherwise)... on my thoughts and personal attachment to money.

I try not to think that money is the root of all evil. But it seems that everytime I turn around, smack. It's confirmed yet again that it is.

I say this because friendships, relationships and acquaintenships (it's a word - but don't look it up!) can end based on money.

I can't tell you how many times I've looked at my 401k and seriously want to cry. I try to rationalize that I never had the money (it was never in my pocket/bank account/under my pillow) so I can't miss it.

BUT I DO.

I think of all the things that the money could have bought if I had it. If it wasn't lost in the stock market decline. The things I could have done. The differences I could have made. The "What If's".

But I think morally and ethically for me, it isn't really about the money or MY MONEY perse, it's about fairness, justness and equality. And respect. I'm not going to take your money, don't take mine.

I'm truly not digressing (not this time), I do have a point. My house is almost painted. Almost. I think and have been told that it should be completed tomorrow. My friend is painting it and it has taken ONE MONTH. Not six days like my other quote from a friend's step-dad, but one month. And, I helped.

I didn't want to help. I didn't want to paint. But, I did. I did because it was my house and my friend.

Now, it's a matter of payment. He can't or I should say won't come up with a figure. I've asked since before the project started. I just wanted to pay and have it done. I have the other quote and recently called the paint store to ask for painter rates, so I roughly have an idea, roughly. I have no idea how many hours he's actually put in and I don't know his hourly rate. He says if times weren't tough, he wouldn't charge me at all. He wants me to pay what I think is fair. I've asked him what he would charge someone else and he says that's not fair. He thinks he'll tell me what he'll charge me, he just can't come to terms with it. Somehow, I'm not seeing that this is a win-win situation, regardless. Can friendships remain intact when business is involved?

Then there is the issue of my recent weekend getaway to Cedar Point. Several discussions were made about estimations of costs and expenses of the weekend, prior to the weekend. I paid for everything and itemized the expenses down by what everyone owed during the weekend. Two of three paid me immediately. One has not. At the end of the weekend in parting ways, it was asked how much was owed and the amount was told. And that was that. No word of when it would be paid or why it wasn't being paid.

I've been assured that I will be paid. That it wasn't a matter of the person not having the money, but not carrying around that kind of cash. Huh? If you know that there are expenses to a weekend away and that the expenses are being split, why wouldn't you have money to cover what you think it would be?

Again, it's my money. It's not that I can't pay my bills or put food on the table without this person paying their share; however, it's a matter of principle that someone would take advantage of another person and their money and not respect them enough to pay when the service was complete or give an explanation as to why they can't or didn't pay.

Maybe my roots of evil run deeper than I can fathom in regard to money. Maybe I've been taken advantage of far too many times - footing the bill, paying more than my share, getting IOU's that aren't repaid. Why is it that some people feel it's acceptable to be irresponsible and/or inconsiderate of other's and their money or their time?

Maybe I'm a person reincarnate from the depression. Yeah that's it.

And I believe that Elvis is still alive and unicorns can fly.