MS purchased U2 concert tickets in November 2009. Due to injury and the canceling of the show in 2010, he was finally able to see the concert on June 26, 2011 at Michigan State University. MS had asked me a couple months ago if I would like to go with him. I am not a concert fan. I like U2, but not a huge fan per se. I agreed to go. I wasn't really filled in on the details that MS' brother and his fiancee and a group of others were going. I wasn't informed of the details either, which I was OK with for the most part as I was just along for the ride.
I tried to be OK with not being in control. I didn't let it bother me, the lack of organization and planning. The clusterfuck that clearly became annoying to others in the group. I was along for the ride. There were eight of us (two different vehicles) that met up in a parking lot. The goal was then to find the rest of the group that were moving from bar to bar. We headed to find them, with two of the group using their google walk maps to get to the destination. A third in the party asked a security guard for directions. We followed the guard's direction - which was opposite of the cell phone directions. Apparently there were two destinations with the same name, but the one the guard sent us to was a restaurant and not a bar and pub. We were now two miles from our destination. One in the group bought a six pack from a grocery store and they drank in the lot while MS and I went to wait in line at Subway to get food. A taxi arrived to take us to the bar and MS and I decided that food was more important. We split with the group.
MS and I ate and then walked to the stadium. We got to the stadium an hour before the opening act, Florence and the Machine. We were in section 9, to the left of the stage and 34 rows up. I was shocked by the price of the tickets, which showed $250. MS never said how much they were, but was disappointed that it wasn't a sold out crowd and that general admission were selling for $30. It amazed me that the cost was so expensive to sit outside on bleachers and that MS would pay it!
The concert was good. I recognized five songs. The technology and stage was pretty awesome. What amazed me the most....MS knew EVERY. SINGLE. SONG. MS LOVES U2. I hadn't known until last night that this was the fifth time MS has seen U2 in concert. He purchased the tickets when they first went on sale and bought the best available fearing they would sell out in 15 minutes as the previous show he hoped to attend had.
I worried yesterday and wondered as I stood next to him, if I was deserving of going. Who had he purchased the extra ticket for in mind when he bought them? Was there anyone or just that he didn't want to go solo (as the rest of the group were nowhere near us!)? Did I disappoint him that I didn't know more about U2? And bottomline, I accepted and stopped worrying about it all and acknowledged that he asked me because he wanted me to go. He wanted me to experience the concert with him. That nothing else mattered.
I did ask MS on the walk back to the car what he thought of the concert and how it compared to his other U2 concert experiences. He answered, "It was OK. They are getting OLD! They just don't have the same energy as they once did!" He also expressed disappointment that they only sang three songs from their latest CD. Well, what is to be expected from a group that has remained together since 1978?
I definitely enjoyed the experience of going with MS. I appreciated being next to MS as he swayed and sang every single word of every single song. Learning something new about MS and loving him more.
Monday, June 27, 2011
Guest Bedroom Transformation
I made some changes to the guest bedroom to make it a little more personable for W. Of course I wanted to see where he preferred to sleep. So the bedroom change from the bunk bed along the back wall allowed for him to use the ladder. If he didn't want to sleep in the bed, I could either move the mattress to the floor or I could use the aero bed on the floor if he wanted something bigger than the twin. He decided he wanted to sleep in the bunk, so I changed the bedding to be more masculine than the photo.
Of course I had already purchased the full size bedding, a piece of art and the area rug for the room transformation. I just needed to get the couch out, the bunk bed disassembled and purchase the full size bed and frame. No big deal, right? I had the bunk bed disassembled rather quickly and last Monday T helped me put it in the storage room. The couch? Another story. We attempted every which way to get it out and had no success. I manged to take the paint off the door trim in three different spots though! Fortunately MS and I managed to get it out rather quickly after removing the door (I had attempted that myself with no luck!).
I absolutely LOVE the new bedroom look! It is wonderful to finally have an assembled room. W painted the wall artwork and I painted the lampshades. T attempted to paint one lampshade which was an EPIC FAIL. I plan to paint another white one as I don't care for the yellow one I painted - but I was too lazy to paint over the yellow!
The picture doesn't capture the pale blue and green circles well on the lampshade and artwork. W did a great job on his picture!
What do you think of the room transformation?
Wonderful Weekend Recap
I had the most wonderful weekend. Some days I really struggle with what MS and I are doing in our relationship. I enjoy his company and love him, but I struggle with whether we should be dating. Our parenting differences are always going to be present. I suppose I sweep them under the rug as it doesn't impact us enjoying each other, most of the time.
With the respite and dog sitting, I haven't been to MS' house in several weeks. The plan was for me to head to his place on Friday night where we would go to a nice dinner at a restaurant he has wanted to take me to since November. We still haven't gone. T started his baseball tournament and it wasn't until Friday at 4:30p.m. that we learned he would be playing at 9:00a.m. at home Saturday morning. So it didn't make sense to head an hour north for the night to be back bright and early. MS' son was staying the night at a friend's house so MS offered to come down instead!
We met up with JA and her husband (and kids) for dinner on a whim! We then went back to their house and played a few games and hung out! It was great to be able to see JA, I really miss seeing her! We had a blast and it was a much better impromptu than a fancy dinner with just MS.
Saturday morning we went to the game. In a great finish, T's team WON! Was an awesome game. MS and I decided to head downtown to a little cafe but found a new restaurant en route that was open. We were the only customers in the place that had been open since March. A coffee, cafe that offers family game nights, live bands and promotes local food sources. The food was good, but overpriced for the amount and quality and MS and I agreed we probably wouldn't go back.
Then it was onto a day of accomplishment. We rented a truck from Menards and purchased a new full size bed for my guest bedroom. We were able to move the couch out of the guest bedroom to the basement after removing two doors, stair rail and smashing with all our might to get it past the basement trim! We made several trips to home depot to finish the front landscaping bricks including top soil and grass seed! I finally purchased a cheap patio set too! We assembled the guest bedroom and finished the yard. I was so absolutely relieved to tackle such big and overwhelming projects. MS even helped me hang four pieces of art too (since I have angst with adding holes in the wall!).
We managed to finish everything by about 6:45p.m. He headed home and I showered and packed for the rest of the weekend at his place. I grabbed pizza for dinner on the way to his house and crashed with an allergy attack during the movie Cropsy.
Sunday we woke up around 8a.m. and had breakfast and best 2 out of 3 of Skipbo. MS was just glad that he won a game! Then we went for a 15 mile rollerblade adventure, which we both survived with only a blister! Then we headed home to shower and change for the U2 concert at Michigan Stadium.
I couldn't have asked for a better weekend. Good friends. Great accomplishments. Great Entertainment. As I lay in bed next to MS this morning I was happy. I am blessed. I am not looking for perfection, but with each day, it appears that I find myself understanding, accepting and loving him more. One day at a time. And today, when he confirmed that he has made arrangements for us to plan a vacation in August, I believe it may actually happen and I am looking forward.
With the respite and dog sitting, I haven't been to MS' house in several weeks. The plan was for me to head to his place on Friday night where we would go to a nice dinner at a restaurant he has wanted to take me to since November. We still haven't gone. T started his baseball tournament and it wasn't until Friday at 4:30p.m. that we learned he would be playing at 9:00a.m. at home Saturday morning. So it didn't make sense to head an hour north for the night to be back bright and early. MS' son was staying the night at a friend's house so MS offered to come down instead!
We met up with JA and her husband (and kids) for dinner on a whim! We then went back to their house and played a few games and hung out! It was great to be able to see JA, I really miss seeing her! We had a blast and it was a much better impromptu than a fancy dinner with just MS.
Saturday morning we went to the game. In a great finish, T's team WON! Was an awesome game. MS and I decided to head downtown to a little cafe but found a new restaurant en route that was open. We were the only customers in the place that had been open since March. A coffee, cafe that offers family game nights, live bands and promotes local food sources. The food was good, but overpriced for the amount and quality and MS and I agreed we probably wouldn't go back.
Then it was onto a day of accomplishment. We rented a truck from Menards and purchased a new full size bed for my guest bedroom. We were able to move the couch out of the guest bedroom to the basement after removing two doors, stair rail and smashing with all our might to get it past the basement trim! We made several trips to home depot to finish the front landscaping bricks including top soil and grass seed! I finally purchased a cheap patio set too! We assembled the guest bedroom and finished the yard. I was so absolutely relieved to tackle such big and overwhelming projects. MS even helped me hang four pieces of art too (since I have angst with adding holes in the wall!).
We managed to finish everything by about 6:45p.m. He headed home and I showered and packed for the rest of the weekend at his place. I grabbed pizza for dinner on the way to his house and crashed with an allergy attack during the movie Cropsy.
Sunday we woke up around 8a.m. and had breakfast and best 2 out of 3 of Skipbo. MS was just glad that he won a game! Then we went for a 15 mile rollerblade adventure, which we both survived with only a blister! Then we headed home to shower and change for the U2 concert at Michigan Stadium.
I couldn't have asked for a better weekend. Good friends. Great accomplishments. Great Entertainment. As I lay in bed next to MS this morning I was happy. I am blessed. I am not looking for perfection, but with each day, it appears that I find myself understanding, accepting and loving him more. One day at a time. And today, when he confirmed that he has made arrangements for us to plan a vacation in August, I believe it may actually happen and I am looking forward.
Foster Care: Respite Recap
In addition to surviving the 2.5 week stay of the puppy, less than 2 days later, I had my first respite overnight foster care placement. I had been asked several times to have the younger brother stay of the brothers that I had provided the day respite for as the foster parents were going on vacation. Due to my work schedule and T being with his dad for the week, I had said no, but I could provide for some of the time if necessary. The foster mother found another respite provider, but days before and after a few hours with the family, W was not comfortable and asked the foster mother if he could stay with me.
I felt flattered that W felt comfortable enough to request that he stay with us. The foster parents altered their vacation to include W in some of it and we provided respite from Saturday - Monday and a friend provided respite for a few more days.
W was a joy to have around and I found his communication much more welcoming than Bubba's whining! We did some arts and crafts, baking, errands, tennis, beach, movies and eating out. His comments were laughable - with his fears of sharks in Lake Michigan and the waitress tainting his fruit punch. He was very inquisitive asking about my desire to foster and why I haven't fostered more. Inquiring if I thought it was OK to have a bunkbed for foster kids and if I feared they would fall. Questioning my ring and if it was my wedding ring and why I wore it. I love the brutal honesty and inquiry of kids. I had prepared by purchasing a waterproof mattress pad which worked well as the bed stayed dry when he didn't either night.
Definitely a good experience and one that we would do again! We saw his siblings on Monday after a parental visit and his older brother was disappointed he didn't get to visit too (he is in a different foster home).
Last week I received a call to provide respite for a weekend for two children, female 7 and male 4. I agreed and we scheduled the weekend in August when T is done with baseball. I hadn't talked to T first and then I thought maybe I should do respite when T was with his dad so he didn't have to share his room with a 4 year old. I called T and his attitude was amazing. He told me that he didn't care either way and since I already scheduled it, to keep it! T ROCKS! I am so blessed. Looking forward to experience #2 (assuming nothing comes up between now and then) to go as smoothly as the first!
I felt flattered that W felt comfortable enough to request that he stay with us. The foster parents altered their vacation to include W in some of it and we provided respite from Saturday - Monday and a friend provided respite for a few more days.
W was a joy to have around and I found his communication much more welcoming than Bubba's whining! We did some arts and crafts, baking, errands, tennis, beach, movies and eating out. His comments were laughable - with his fears of sharks in Lake Michigan and the waitress tainting his fruit punch. He was very inquisitive asking about my desire to foster and why I haven't fostered more. Inquiring if I thought it was OK to have a bunkbed for foster kids and if I feared they would fall. Questioning my ring and if it was my wedding ring and why I wore it. I love the brutal honesty and inquiry of kids. I had prepared by purchasing a waterproof mattress pad which worked well as the bed stayed dry when he didn't either night.
Definitely a good experience and one that we would do again! We saw his siblings on Monday after a parental visit and his older brother was disappointed he didn't get to visit too (he is in a different foster home).
Last week I received a call to provide respite for a weekend for two children, female 7 and male 4. I agreed and we scheduled the weekend in August when T is done with baseball. I hadn't talked to T first and then I thought maybe I should do respite when T was with his dad so he didn't have to share his room with a 4 year old. I called T and his attitude was amazing. He told me that he didn't care either way and since I already scheduled it, to keep it! T ROCKS! I am so blessed. Looking forward to experience #2 (assuming nothing comes up between now and then) to go as smoothly as the first!
Bubba Recap
We officially survived Bubba's stay. I have to admit that with less then two days left, I was ready to do bodily harm to him. When my previous post had been almost positive. I started to question whether or not I was a good person and how would I ever be able to be a foster parent. Granted I didn't harm Bubba. I didn't want to see him. I sent him to his cage. I raised my voice. How was I so intolerant and unaccepting? Was I to blame?
Here's what happened...Bubba had been out twice since 1:00a.m. with the most recent being 8a.m. My allergies kicked in hard and I took an allergy pill and went back to sleep. I woke to hear Bubba crunching. I listened intently and realized that it wasn't the sound of him eating his dog food. I got out of bed at 9:30a.m. and this is what I saw:
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Bubba had helped himself to my blockbuster movies and mail pile that were stacked on the coffee table. Did you notice the movie title? The Dilemma. How convenient. And the other DVD was missing: The Mechanic. I found The Mechanic under the rug in one piece but scratched up. I had to purchase both movies from Blockbuster at $21.19 each. I suppose it could have been worse. I did eventually get over my anger and never did take it out on Bubba. I guess I just had too high of expectations for a 14 month old puppy - especially since it wasn't anything that I had left on the floor for him.
I have to admit for a quick minute I missed him staring at me every morning watching me get ready in the bathroom. Most of the time he was actually in the bathroom but sometimes I could feel a little less creeped out by him in the hallway.
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We had a great reunion giving Bubba back to my mom. We enjoyed him trying on our sunglasses and trying to get pictures. We are looking forward to seeing him again, at his house!
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Here's what happened...Bubba had been out twice since 1:00a.m. with the most recent being 8a.m. My allergies kicked in hard and I took an allergy pill and went back to sleep. I woke to hear Bubba crunching. I listened intently and realized that it wasn't the sound of him eating his dog food. I got out of bed at 9:30a.m. and this is what I saw:
I have to admit for a quick minute I missed him staring at me every morning watching me get ready in the bathroom. Most of the time he was actually in the bathroom but sometimes I could feel a little less creeped out by him in the hallway.
We had a great reunion giving Bubba back to my mom. We enjoyed him trying on our sunglasses and trying to get pictures. We are looking forward to seeing him again, at his house!
Friday, June 10, 2011
Bubba & The Dog Wash
Tonight T and I took Bubba to the dog wash. Of course, we went and checked it out post bowling, T's haircut, T's clothes shopping and shopping to pick up sundae toppings and beverages. The dog wash looked easy enough: like a car wash, but an indoor enclosed wash room with everything imaginable to wash your dog/pet. A minimum of $5 charge. We headed home to make quick sundaes and grab Bubba for the drive and adventure of the dog wash.
Bubba must have known something was going on. He wasn't heading in the direction of school for his morning field trip or to the ball fields. Within a mile from our destination he began whining consistently. We pulled up to the Dog Wash and parked in the Dog Wash Parking Spot.
We took Bubba inside and he eagerly walked up the dog ramp and into the wash basin. We connected him to the leash in the tub and put on our heavy duty (provided) aprons. We purchased .50 of "cookies" for Bubba to give him while we washed him. Our initial $5.00 allowed us to rinse, shampoo, condition and partially use the flea and tick rinse. Since we didn't add the extra money in the allotted time, we had to put in another minimum of $5.00. We added more flea and tick, rinsed and then used the cool blow dryer in addition to towel drying. The whole event lasted about 15 minutes, if that. Bubba was a real trooper and it was nice that the flooding of water happened on their floor, not my bathroom floor! Definitely a great experience and one I would recommend for pet owners.
Bubba must have known something was going on. He wasn't heading in the direction of school for his morning field trip or to the ball fields. Within a mile from our destination he began whining consistently. We pulled up to the Dog Wash and parked in the Dog Wash Parking Spot.
We took Bubba inside and he eagerly walked up the dog ramp and into the wash basin. We connected him to the leash in the tub and put on our heavy duty (provided) aprons. We purchased .50 of "cookies" for Bubba to give him while we washed him. Our initial $5.00 allowed us to rinse, shampoo, condition and partially use the flea and tick rinse. Since we didn't add the extra money in the allotted time, we had to put in another minimum of $5.00. We added more flea and tick, rinsed and then used the cool blow dryer in addition to towel drying. The whole event lasted about 15 minutes, if that. Bubba was a real trooper and it was nice that the flooding of water happened on their floor, not my bathroom floor! Definitely a great experience and one I would recommend for pet owners.
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Bubba all clean! |
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Welcome...Freshman
As of today, I am officially the proud mother of a high school FRESHMAN! T has graduated 8th grade with flying colors. He continues to amaze me with his independence, academics, athletics and great sportsmanship.
He decided that he is taking an Honors and an Advanced Placement class next year. I love the possibility that he can test for college credits from the AP class, but more importantly that he will be challenged and more prepared for college than I felt I had been.
So my baby boy, my growing son, at fourteen now stands at 5'7.5" and 133 pounds. If nothing else, I will always have age over him, unfortunately not intelligence or looks!
He decided that he is taking an Honors and an Advanced Placement class next year. I love the possibility that he can test for college credits from the AP class, but more importantly that he will be challenged and more prepared for college than I felt I had been.
So my baby boy, my growing son, at fourteen now stands at 5'7.5" and 133 pounds. If nothing else, I will always have age over him, unfortunately not intelligence or looks!
Dog Sitting
I have officially survived, but more importantly, my parents "puppy" has survived eight days of me dog sitting. Granted, the dog sitting isn't over, yet. For the most part, we have all managed quite well, but I won't be getting a dog anytime soon. Bubba, the 110#, black lab, 14.5 month puppy will be staying with us for another week. Here are a few things I have learned to date:
1. Dog sitting can be compared to foster care - taking care of someone else's loved one, adjusting to their behaviors and temperaments; attempting to teach, love and nurture while changing everything about your daily routine and lifestyle.
2. I confirm that I am not a morning person. Waking at 6:30a.m. to let Bubba out after taking him out at 1:15a.m. is not a welcomed opportunity.
3. Teaching a dog to not go outside without adult supervision/company is NOT a good idea. I am sure my neighbors can vouch as they probably prefer not to see me standing in a night gown in the back yard.
4. Watching a large dog mad hump his bed pillow is HYSTERICAL.
5. Putting the dog's leash under the bbq wheel is NOT a good idea when one is multi-tasking and the BF is standing by dumbfoundly watching said dog race to the neighbors. Watching said BF watch the said dog spaz out and drag the bbq grill while trying to free self is NOT entertaining.
6. Involving the dog in as much as possible is equally rewarding for the dog as almost everyone involved. Dog loves going for morning field trips to take T to school. He enjoys watching T's ball games and getting lots of attention from the crowd but gets easily frustrated that he hasn't figured out how to catch the balls hit on the field side of the fence.
7. Bubba is a WUSS. We had a trip to the local dog park on Sunday. He cowered by me almost the entire two hours fearing every other dog, especially dogs that were smaller than his paw! Oh what a BABY.
8. Being homebound hasn't been as difficult as I imagined, but definitely has been an adjustment. Of course having T around has been helpful, but when he is with his dad, that means it's just Bubba and Me. And well, I have to admit that I am getting a little irritated (runny eyes and headaches) from the dog smell. Looking forward to taking him to the dog wash soon, as long as I can be sure to not have to deal with the WET dog smell!
1. Dog sitting can be compared to foster care - taking care of someone else's loved one, adjusting to their behaviors and temperaments; attempting to teach, love and nurture while changing everything about your daily routine and lifestyle.
2. I confirm that I am not a morning person. Waking at 6:30a.m. to let Bubba out after taking him out at 1:15a.m. is not a welcomed opportunity.
3. Teaching a dog to not go outside without adult supervision/company is NOT a good idea. I am sure my neighbors can vouch as they probably prefer not to see me standing in a night gown in the back yard.
4. Watching a large dog mad hump his bed pillow is HYSTERICAL.
5. Putting the dog's leash under the bbq wheel is NOT a good idea when one is multi-tasking and the BF is standing by dumbfoundly watching said dog race to the neighbors. Watching said BF watch the said dog spaz out and drag the bbq grill while trying to free self is NOT entertaining.
6. Involving the dog in as much as possible is equally rewarding for the dog as almost everyone involved. Dog loves going for morning field trips to take T to school. He enjoys watching T's ball games and getting lots of attention from the crowd but gets easily frustrated that he hasn't figured out how to catch the balls hit on the field side of the fence.
7. Bubba is a WUSS. We had a trip to the local dog park on Sunday. He cowered by me almost the entire two hours fearing every other dog, especially dogs that were smaller than his paw! Oh what a BABY.
8. Being homebound hasn't been as difficult as I imagined, but definitely has been an adjustment. Of course having T around has been helpful, but when he is with his dad, that means it's just Bubba and Me. And well, I have to admit that I am getting a little irritated (runny eyes and headaches) from the dog smell. Looking forward to taking him to the dog wash soon, as long as I can be sure to not have to deal with the WET dog smell!
Sixty Five Years Old...
Last week was my father's birthday. He turned SIXTY-FIVE. SIXTY. FIVE.
I have to admit that as of November 1, 2010, I would have bet money on the fact that he would turn 65. I would have bet money on the fact that he wouldn't live 65 days. Obviously, I was wrong. I am OK with being wrong, really I am. I am just not sure if being wrong in this case is...right.
I called my father on his birthday and left him a message. I purposely didn't wish him the usual "Happy Birthday" or "Hope you have a Happy Birthday". I am not one to lie, not very well at least and never intentionally. Happy is relative, and not in the related way as in wishing my father Happy any day. It just isn't possible. I can wish him a day better than the one before. I can wish him happiness, but I know that he has far outgrown and surpassed the ability to BE HAPPY.
He called me back. Our phone call was breathy and shallow. He gasped for breath. He grasped for words. He was failing at both. He was discharged from the hospital after SEVEN weeks. After TEN days home, he was taken back to the ER. According to my brother, he was given three options: 1) Go home and get strong for the LVAD (Seriously?), 2) Go home with Hospice & no Primacor IV (die in two weeks) or 3) Be admitted to the hospital with IV and die in August. Seems like a wide array of options, which is really feasible and realistic? I have no idea. The Social Worker never found the time or reason to return my calls.
My father is home. What does that mean? I have no idea. Each day is becoming more difficult. The Primacor is no longer as effective. The end is near. How near?
I wonder how I will feel when his end is here. I wonder how long it will be before I am notified. I wonder how I will be affected. The reality, I try not to wonder. When reality happens, I will no longer wonder. I will know.
I have to admit that as of November 1, 2010, I would have bet money on the fact that he would turn 65. I would have bet money on the fact that he wouldn't live 65 days. Obviously, I was wrong. I am OK with being wrong, really I am. I am just not sure if being wrong in this case is...right.
I called my father on his birthday and left him a message. I purposely didn't wish him the usual "Happy Birthday" or "Hope you have a Happy Birthday". I am not one to lie, not very well at least and never intentionally. Happy is relative, and not in the related way as in wishing my father Happy any day. It just isn't possible. I can wish him a day better than the one before. I can wish him happiness, but I know that he has far outgrown and surpassed the ability to BE HAPPY.
He called me back. Our phone call was breathy and shallow. He gasped for breath. He grasped for words. He was failing at both. He was discharged from the hospital after SEVEN weeks. After TEN days home, he was taken back to the ER. According to my brother, he was given three options: 1) Go home and get strong for the LVAD (Seriously?), 2) Go home with Hospice & no Primacor IV (die in two weeks) or 3) Be admitted to the hospital with IV and die in August. Seems like a wide array of options, which is really feasible and realistic? I have no idea. The Social Worker never found the time or reason to return my calls.
My father is home. What does that mean? I have no idea. Each day is becoming more difficult. The Primacor is no longer as effective. The end is near. How near?
I wonder how I will feel when his end is here. I wonder how long it will be before I am notified. I wonder how I will be affected. The reality, I try not to wonder. When reality happens, I will no longer wonder. I will know.
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